Cute as a Button

Goodbye to You...

2006-04-20T14:59:00.000-07:00

Well, we ended class on a good note today, so I might as well end my blog on a good one as well. We've come a long way this year, and it was cool today how Dr. VEW told us that we really taught ourselves. There were no lectures, just a few "teaching moments" by her along the way. Everyone in our class had some experience that they could relate teaching to, and in our discussions we all helped each other to figure things out. We didn't realize it, but while we were learning how to become teachers, we were already being teachers. This semester I have gained knowledge in things I had no clue about before I entered our class. I knew I wanted to be a teacher, but I had no idea how a curriculm was made or that the ISBE made so many standards for school teachers to meet in their classrooms. I knew nothing about laws, or how to teach non-English speaking students, or students with disabilities. I had my biases, and I still do. However, my snobby thoughts on how education should be have come down to earth. I no longer see higher tracks and test scores as the sole indicators of intelligence. I no longer think we should "ship all the immigrants back to where they came from." And I no longer think that memorization equals learning. Over time, I've come to see the relevancy in what we've learned in class and what Dewey, Freire, Etc. talked about in the ridiculously long packet of excerpts. I've learned solutions to the problems in "multicultural education" and I know the reasons why multicultural education is important and needs to be implemented. I feel so proud of myself that I've developed my philosophy of education and am now working on a portfolio. It seems like becoming a teacher is not just a distant dream now, but a reality that I know I'm steadily preparing myself for. I'll continue with my field experience until the end of May term. Out of all the areas I've developed, my hands-on teaching skills have improved the most. Although we shouldn't be analyzing teaching techniques yet, I always try different things out with my students when there is a sub and I teach the lesson plan. I've gained a lot of confidence in myself...it's been fun...

Focus on my Focal Student

2006-04-18T17:25:00.000-07:00

Well our class is coming to an end...a very long end for me because I won't be in 255 in the fall. I hope I don't forget everything. Even though class is ending, my observation isn't. I talked to Ms. H and the students and and it looks like I'll be staying all through may term. I know I've become quite attached to them, and I think a lot of them are really sad that I only have about three weeks left. In fact, I have lunch dates with various students almost every other day for the rest of the year.

I've been working a lot with my focal student and we've grown pretty close. It seems like she's had a lot of pain in her life and at lunch today she started to cry. For her, it was just too hard to talk about her family situation. Aside from the sad stuff, though, I feel like I've learned a lot about her and I don't think the student portrait is going to be a problem at all to write. Today at lunch I even talked to her about Brittany's hip hop/ rap culture presentation (which was a really great and relevant presentation) because I wanted to see how much she was influenced by this culture. Once I brought up "bald-headed," her and her friends went into a slang word frenzy and they started cracking up when they saw my confused face. They decided they had better translate because I'm "such a white girl." It's true. I am quite white. When I asked them how they were affected by rap/hip hop culture, they really didn't understand because it's hard to see yourself as having a culture when it's what you do everyday and it's who you are. From there we went to talking about diversity in the class room. All three of the girls said that they sometimes feel disadvantaged in class because there's only two black teachers in the school. They also said that when they have a question because they don't understand what's going on in class, they feel like the teacher thinks they're dumber than the white kids. This is why most of their friends are black, they told me, because they can understand eachother and they realize they've grown up with similar life styles. It was made very clear to me, however, that they do have white friends and that they like me even though I'm white. I think the girls don't look at race when choosing friends, its just about who they can relate to, who approached them when they were new students from Chicago, and who respects them and their bluntness. I'm learning a lot, and having H. as my observation student has opened my eyes to the diversity that I must embrace as I continue on the road to certification. I even tried my own slang today, and I used "japping" correctly just like Brittany taught me. It made the girls laugh and smile, I even got an applause, maybe I'm not completely hopeless.

And we're done...Well, almost...

2006-04-13T09:07:00.000-07:00

Today was the last literature circle. The group presented on Nell Noddings' The Challenge to Care in Schools. I thought the group did an excellent job balancing between giving their information and having open discussion; they really seemed to know their stuff. Some interesting points were brought up in class though about whether we should get to a certain point in our academic lives and just follow one track that will bring us to our careers eventually. Opinions on this matter were generally mixed, most often people complained about the relevancy of math and whether knowing calculus helped them at all. Personally, I am very strongly against Noddings' idea. I disike math as much as anyone possibly can, but I still need it. Maybe I'm not calculating the area of a circle or finding limits of equations everyday, but I believe in learning as much as one can. Having a wide-range of necessary gen-eds in college has made me a more well-rounded student. I have yet to change my major since coming to school, but if I came in to follow the English path, after following a strictly English path in high school, I would have never discovered my passion for Greek and Roman Studies (which I sometimes like a lot more than English). The bottom line is we have the opportunity to choose what we want to do with our lives, if one track was picked out for us, we would have some pretty unhappy people in their jobs. We could look at it from the non-English track also. What if someone was on the math track once they got to high school, sure they could read and write, but would the be able to intelligibly construct an argument in the form of an essay? In my belief, knowing other subjects actually increases my competence in the subject areas I love. In science, I learned how to concisely explain my results with only solid evidence and no opinions. In history, I learned how to better understand the time period my literature was set in. And math taught me to never give up when something is particularly challenging.

I also didn't like the idea that was presented about choosing our teachers. I've had wonderful teachers and horrible ones; the wonderful ones made me happy to come to class everyday, but the horrible ones taught me how to be adaptable. I've learned not only to appreciate "niceness" in a teacher. The higher their expectations and the harder they push, the better the students come out in the end. If I got to choose my teachers, I would have listened to what my peers said. By doing that, I would have missed out on being taught by some really great people. I have learned that my opinion about most teachers is the exact opposite of my peers' opinions.

I asked a question to the group on what we should do in observation to show we care, and I think the response they gave was both feasible and good. We can easily find out about our students, make them feel good about themselves, and make ourselves open to help them. I know that the mere fact that I know all the students' names and can say at least one fact about them makes them realize that I pay attention to them in class and that I really want to get to know them. The best feeling in the world is when you feel like your teacher likes you. Caring in schools I beleive is crucial, because, as Briana said, "If we establish a caring relationship, we have opened so many doors for ourselves to encourage academics and push the students to try their best."

Nikki Giovanni

2006-04-12T21:18:00.000-07:00

I had a really great experience tonight when I got to hear a lecture from Nikki Giovanni, so I've decided to share about it. First off, my observation class has been doing a poetry unit for this past month (I think because it's national poetry month) and one of the poets that we actually spent quite a bit of time learning about was Nikki Giovanni. My class read Knoxville, TN and Oppossum Crossing, so when I told Ms. H that Dr. Giovanni was coming she was just as pumped as I was.

I didn't realize it just from her poetry, but Dr. Giovanni is a really smart lady. She had some of the most profound insights about the black experience, I will forever look to her as an inspiration when I think about what multicultural education means to me. She wrote a children's book called Rosa, about Rosa Park's heroic fight for civil rights the day she refused to give up her bus seat, and she shared it with us. She brought up one particularly incredible story, which I will use this blog to share about. She told us that before she was about to receive the Rosa Park's award in Montgomery, AL, the press came up to her and asked her what she thought about James Blake's death (the bus driver who told Parks she's have to move). She said to the press, "well...another one bites the dust." When the widow heard this her comment back to Nikki Giovanni was that her husband was just a man of his time. Giovanni really made me think though with what she said next. She said, he was not a many of his time because if we were all men of our time we would still be beating slaves and raping women. She said that true men ( and women) of their time act for the future, they stand up for what's right, and they make a difference. The way she worded it was absolutely beautiful. What will they say years from now when they look back on our generation? When they see that our consititutional claims for equality are just words. More than ever, I want to be a woman of my time, I want to make a difference. I know I have the power to stand up and do what's right. I have priviledge, and I should use it.

This brings me to my second favorite moment of her talk. A girl from the audience asked Dr. Giovanni how she overcame the obstacles in her life ("having two strikes against her: being black and being a woman.") I loved what Giovanni said and I'm so glad she said it. She just stood up there shaking her head, she said that she doesn't look at it like that. She doesn't see strikes, she sees opportunity. She told the girl that if she never sees what she has the ability to do, she will never do it. Giovanni doesn't use her blackness as an excuse. Because black people have been wronged in the past, she doesn't let it bring her down. Instead, it gives her another reason and more motivation to raise her voice. This left me to wonder what Giovanni would say to black students saying they're "acting white" when they do well in school. I have a presumtion that she would teach those kids a lesson. She would say that "acting black" is rising above the situation, doing something about your current status in life and working hard to change.

Giovanni presented a god message for future teachers. We have to not look at race as an excuse. Being a woman, being black, being mexican, those aren't strikes, being lazy, stupid, or weak are strikes. As future educators, it's our job to be strong. There will undoubtedly be obstacles, but we have the power to make a difference because we can change the way our students see the world and eachother. I'm in poem mode now...so I'm going to put up one of my favorite poems (not be Giovanni) because it really makes me feel good about what I'm learning to do...

What Teachers Make, orYou can always go to law school if things don't work out
By Taylor Mali

He says the problem with teachers is, "What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?" He reminds the other dinner guests that it's true what they say about teachers: Those who can, do; those who can't, teach.
I decide to bite my tongue instead of his and resist the temptation to remind the dinner guests that it's also true what they say about lawyers.
Because we're eating, after all, and this is polite company.
"I mean, you¹re a teacher, Taylor," he says. "Be honest. What do you make?"
And I wish he hadn't done that (asked me to be honest) because, you see, I have a policy about honesty and ass-kicking: if you ask for it, I have to let you have it.
You want to know what I make?
I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could. I can make a C+ feel like a Congressional medal of honor and an A- feel like a slap in the face. How dare you waste my time with anything less than your very best.
I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall in absolute silence. No, you may not work in groups. No, you may not ask a question. Why won't I let you get a drink of water? Because you're not thirsty, you're bored, that's why.
I make parents tremble in fear when I call home: I hope I haven't called at a bad time, I just wanted to talk to you about something Billy said today. Billy said, "Leave the kid alone. I still cry sometimes, don't you?" And it was the noblest act of courage I have ever seen.
I make parents see their children for who they are and what they can be.
You want to know what I make?
I make kids wonder, I make them question. I make them criticize. I make them apologize and mean it. I make them write. I make them read, read, read. I make them spell definitely beautiful, definitely beautiful, definitely beautiful over and over and over again until they will never misspell either one of those words again. I make them show all their work in math. And hide it on their final drafts in English. I make them understand that if you got this (brains) then you follow this (heart) and if someone ever tries to judge you by what you make, you give them this (the finger).
Let me break it down for you, so you know what I say is true: I make a goddamn difference! What about you?

I passed!

2006-04-11T08:45:00.000-07:00

Well I have good news and bad news. The good is that I passed my Basic Skills Test, the bad is that I didn't get into Ed. 255 next year. The bad news is beyond frustrating considering the fact that there were two sections of 225 this year (that were completely full). There is no possible way that all of us could have gotten into 255.

I'm so glad my test is over, I was actually a little worried I wouldn't pass considering 80% of people don't. I feel like I've taken so many standardized tests over the years, what purpose do they honestly serve? I didn't know it at the time, but my ISATs were used to place me in different levels of classes. My ACT basically determined whether I could get into this school or not. Now this Basic Skills test determines who can be a teacher. Almost every class in college surrounds THE TEST. Not only have I learned that what I get on a test indicates what grade I'll receive in the class, the hidden curriculum has also taught me that how well I do on a test indicates how much I know. I consider myself a fairly good test taker, so in highschool I would scoff at those who claimed they did poorly in school because they were "bad test-takers." It wasn't until I started working with my seventh graders that I realized how real this "excuse" is. I work with a kid on his spelling words. He can spell them all out for me perfectly on paper and orally, but when he sits down to actually take the test he panics and consistently gets C's. Lucky for him, in Ms. H's class spelling tests are the only tests I've seen. She realizes that kids need to be assessed in different ways and because of this their grades are based on homework completon, daily language practice participation, essays, projects, presentations, etc. It's the same for our education class. We don't take a single test, but we truly are assessed on how well we know the material. I don't think teachers realize that although tests are easier to grade, they don't necessarily show what the student really knows. Writing a paper about a topic and teaching other students about it are ways students can show what they've really learned. Personally, I love giving presentations because there seems to be less pressure, less stress involved, and I always feel like I will never forget the information I'm presenting on for the rest of my life. If I just read School Girls to take a multiple choice tests I would have studied and memorized people, places, and things in the test. Because I gave a presentation though, I made sure I knew the over-arching concepts and knew specific examples from the text I could apply these concepts to. In the end, it's up to the teacher on whether they want to give tests or not. In English class I beleive it's much easier to assign a project on a book and assess grade the kids on how much they seem to have learned. For math, however, I would have been shocked if I ever entered a classroom with a teacher who didn't beleive in tests. I've come to expect tests in math, not projects. I think assessment depends on not only the type of teacher, but the subject matter.

In other news, my focal student still hasn't brought back her camera so I haven't even begun to work on her portrait, all I have are some notes.

Lit. Circle Presentation

2006-04-06T10:58:00.000-07:00

wuerfusdofjieowjfouvju (I'm acting out my frustration in letters and angry faces)! I really thought our presentation was going to go so well, but I was dead wrong. I thought we did a good job of putting it all together, it's just that we didn't anticipate how much classroom discussion was going to go on. I think we were all really stressed out in front of the class, because we knew how little time we had. I wish we could have compared the two schools more. We really wanted to show that even though the girls come from different races and classes, they share many similar experiences because they share the status of being girls. We also didn't get to talk about our conclusions, and what we think should be done. I mean I don't see a definite miracle-working plan, but what we have to do is change institutions and culture before we try to change the kids. Whether it's introducing a gender-equal curriculum, making science appeal to both boys and girls, or mandating a equal pay act that would truly be equal based upon professional degree, amount of yrs at a company, etc. all these things would help so much. We've already made progress in the "slut vs. stud" mentality, but until the day when women are considered to be just as sexual as men, women who are more "promiscuous" than average will be considered sluts. In my opinion, when trying to stop the behavior of calling people sluts and shunning female curiosity, I always ask people to look at themselves and I bring up the double standard. There's nothing wrong with using education inside and outside the classroom to get people to think about and change how they perceive certain things. Nieto says that "If we expect girls to be passive and submissive, we may teach them as if they were" (400). Right now, in the classrooms we observe, girls raise their hands politely while boys shout out the answers. No matter how annoying the teacher may think these boys are, she/he most likely accepts this because "boys will be boys." Girls are expected to be polite and docile. There is a hidden curriculm working all around us. What we need to do is challenge this hidden curriculm. We need to encourage girls to be bold, take risks, and beleive in their abilties. I'm not promoting gender blindness, but we need to teach girls as if they have as much capability as boys. In school, none of the students should be subject to a second status.

My bad day continued into observation time too. I was so excited because I got an email from Mrs. H that there would be a substitute today so I would be teaching the lesson plan. I was so excited because I absolutely love when I'm goven more responsibility. I was wrong to be excited today though. I don't know what it was, but the kids were off the walls. I was getting frustrated, they were getting frustrated. I couldn't get the boys to be quiet, and it's times like this when I sometimes doubt if I have it in me to teach. Most of the time I love it more than anything, but because I'm not an official teacher yet I don't get as much respect. This is so sterotypical, but the girls were quiet and so good. It was the corner of boys that wouldn't do their assignments. Instead they disrupted class and were so loud nobody could even hear me. I have a lot to learn, I have no idea as of right now what to do in that kind of situation. I considered taking on of the boys out into the hallway to talk to him, but I decided not to. I probably should have. Tomorrow is a new day...hopefully it will run a little smoother.

Be funny...like...say jokes

2006-04-05T14:42:00.000-07:00

I really enjoyed yesterday's culture presentations. On the whole, I found them more engaging than previous ones. My favorite was Jim's because I think it gave information that will be very helpful for me when I teach. Many of my students now have ADD and whenever I'm asked to step up and explain things to the class I always worry about how I'm going to get these students to pay attention. Ms. H does a fantastic job of making class fun and enjoyable, but I'm still learning and I'm not too confident in my ability to control the class yet. Today, my group tried an experiment in my classroom with the students, for the most part they were well-behaved, but sometimes Ms. H had to help me out with quieting them down when they got rowdy. I think the kids can tell that I'm nervous sometimes and not always sure of myself. Maybe they think that I'm too serious, and not as fun as Ms. H. Today during our experiment some kids were into it, others were obviously not. I think I now know what I need to work on most in my teaching abilties: how to make it more fun! The kids already think I'm smart, and they seem to understand when I explain things, but when we work at the back table I always feel a sense of uncomfortability. Maybe this uncomfortability is natural, because I'm not their "real teacher," but I think I need to try something to to get the kids to be more outgoing with me. I think it's very interesting that kids would rather have a fun teacher teaching a boring subject than be learning an interesting subject with a boring teacher. I think this is why the kids like English so much. Verbs and adjectives are not really fun, but Ms. H makes them laugh and tells stories. Knowing this, I realize that a lot of pressure is placed upon me as a teacher. My only responsibility won't be to teach them how to read and write, I have to make them love it and I have to be funny..and like..say jokes. When I think about what classes I liked best, It was always the teacher and not "the curriculum" I liked. I haven't figured out yet what I'm going to do, but it has to be something.

Literature Circle tomorrow...oh geez

2006-04-03T21:18:00.000-07:00

These lit. circle presentations are stressful!!! I think our presentation is going to be great, I just have to get my powerpoint stuff in order. Including a variety of sources and citing examples always takes a lot of work and I'm a tad behind. We're going as a group to do research on Wednesday and I'm so excited because my students are great and I know they will be so good. What I really like about our book is that gender issues aren't something that only affect one group of students in a particular race or class, they affect everyone. This way I can actually relate everything Orenstein talks about to my own personal experiences. Although I'm not as extreme as many of the girls, I think body image, self-esteem, and peer-pressures are something every girl struggles with no matter how many sports they're involved in or how much their family supports them. From what I hear my students saying, they feel like the need boyfriends to define their own desireability (even if they can't actually go out and perform the dating rituals.) They also feel pressure to wear nice clothes, be the stars of sport teams, and be a "good" students. Whether they define "good" student by good grades or good manners I do not know, but whatever it is, all the girls want to be liked by their teachers (even the ones they don't like themselves). I was the same way, always a people-pleaser. This book has made me very conscious of how we treat students based on gender. By calling on students equally, working individually with both the boys and the girls, and encouaging the girls to share their journal responses to the class (normally they hate it because they think their ideas are dumb), I hope I'm helping to reduce the achievement gap that for some reason begins in junior high...

Done with Nieto, etc.

2006-03-30T21:12:00.000-08:00

Well I finally finished the book, and I must say that it feels good. This last chapter was actually my favorite because Nieto gave ideas for what we can do to become better teachers. I like a lot of the suggestions she makes and I've found quite a bit of correlation between what she talks about a good teacher doing and what my observation teacher does. I don't think it's any secret that I think Ms. H is fabulous, and this book has only reaffirmed that she should rightfully be my role model when it comes to teaching. When I become a teacher, I will try to implement all these techniques. I love when classrooms are decorated and when people work in groups. In chapter 11, Nieto strongly reinforces the importance of collaboration among teachers. I completely agree with this, because group collaboration is how I learn best. Right now my group has been meeting to discuss our literature circle presentation, and it's honestly going to be so good because we can put together all of our great ideas and refine each other's ideas to make them work. What I'm liking the best about our collaboration is that we can assess what has been done in the past, and we're trying to improve upon that. When we give our presentation, I hope that it can appeal to all the different learning styles because I honestly hate chalk-and-talk lecture formats.

Nieto has taught me about Multicultural education in ways I could have never understood from a mere article about making our schools culturally relevant. As Dr. VEW said it would, my perspective on the type of teacher I want to be and how I'll go about teaching the curriculum has changed quite a bit. Since I'll be an English teacher, I hope to be allowed some leniency in the curriculum so I can teach World Lit. I have so many ideas stirring for the American Indian and African American lit. I'll teach. I know that people learn in different ways, and I always loved when my teachers acknowledged it in their lesson plans. From group projects to free-response journals, I hope to come up with many ways to assess what my future students get out of the material I will have them read.

Considering I really love group discussions, it's one of my favorite ways to self-assess how much I really know, I have been quite disappointed with the last two classes we've had. I don't think I'm alone in this either considering the lack of motivation that spring break plagues students with. I mean the discussion on immigration was uninteresting to me because I felt like I wasn't learning anything new in class and I'm not really up-to-date with current news. The one that we had yesterday though was pretty bad. I felt like everyone was summarizing what was read and then just adding a "i like that" at the end. The discussions used to be really engaging, and I know I'm just as guilty as everyone else, but for me I can't get excited and think of good ideas until I start getting excited about what other people are saying. I think this has the potentioal to hurt me though when I'm a teacher because I know I'm going to have to be the leader, and I'm going to have to be the one that gets the students psyched up to participate. Looking at the calendar, we only have one more discussion, I hope everyone brings their A game because their is no reason that this class should ever be boring. Afterall, we're talking about what we want to do for the rest of our lives.

Back to Blogging

2006-03-28T20:13:00.000-08:00

I'm still in break mode; I was really enjoying not having to blog incessantly last week.

I just finished chapter 10 of Nieto and I learned about the levels of multicultural education. They got me thinking about what level the school I am observing is at, as well as what level my old high school might have been. Because of the amount of diversity in the student population, the racial mixing in friendships/ romantic relationships, the fact that there are numerous ESL classrooms, the amount of diversity in teachers/ aides, and a culturally aware curriculum, I would say that the junior high I observe at would be about a level three out of a possible four. It's not a four because I do think their is some tracking that goes on. For example, most of the kids in the highest level math classes remain to be white, while the minority students are overly represented in BD classes. Still, the English class I observe is very well integrated and their is a good mix of races and cultures among the students because English classes aren't tracked.

On the whole, I think the junior high does a great job of embracing the different cultures of the students. In Ms. H's class, the kids have been learning key phrases in different languages every day of the week. They continued to read African American literature after Black History Month ended, and they all participated in a family tree project so each student could show what family means to them.

The more I think about it, I realize that the schools I attended growing up weren't too embracing of multicultural education. I wouldn't say it was monocultural, but our administrators didn't go to far to make our school anything more than tolerant, or a level 1. It's a start at least. My high school had an ESL program, but the kids in ESL were completely closed off from the rest of the school. Overt discrimination wasn't acceptable, but punishment was largely based upon who you were in the school and if you're parents were heavily involved in school life. I know that because of my white privilege if I stole money from someone's locker I would get a slap on the wrist and have to give the money back. However, if someone of another race committed the same act, they would most likely have been suspended. The school also offered a limited number of language classes, absolutely no special studies classes (i.e.Women's studies or religions of the world classes). In my belief, the students knew as much about multiculturalism as the teachers did, and aversive racism was undeniably present. Considering the faculty was 4% minority teachers and administrators, I never had a non-white teacher until this class. However, everyone in my school knew who the these few teachers were because they were the ones constantly expected to be role models for the minority students. They were treated as though they were respresentatives for their entire race, and were expected to deal with problems of cultural conflict. For some reason, only the African American dean of students disciplined and reprimanded the African American students. Perhaps because the white deans were afraid and uncomfortable. With this tension, though, I think comes the lowered expectations teachers have for minority students and teachers' lack of communication and enthusiasm for their work. Nieto poses answers for what we can do to become multicultural educators. It takes a lot of work, it's more than knowing the definitions and what we should do. Right now I have a lot to learn, but I think a solid first step is using the different classes I'm in now to learn about different cultures and learning about different people through their culture (studying abroad).

Step One: Basic Skills Test

2006-03-12T13:48:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I took the basic skills test. It didn't take nearly as long as they made it seem, but it was still unpleasant. I don't know what the qualifications are to pass, but I'm pretty sure I did ok on the reading comprehension, language arts, and math. The writing section was another story though. I was just too tired by the end to try my best/ care about what I was writing. Hopefully the graders realize that people become intellectually drained by the time they get to the essay portion.

Also, I've been anxious to blog about some interesting things that happened to me at observation Friday. First off, my students are amazing. They heard it was my birthday so they took it upon themselves to go out and get me a gift. I was so shocked and it made me feel so special. Which reminds me...I have to make thank you notes. Friday was kind of bittersweet though. Our class uses blogging to philosophize about education, share our experiences, and examine the role of critical pedagogy and multicultural education. Similarly, Ms H's class keeps journals so they can write out their thoughts that relate to what they're learning in class at the time. The only thing that's different is that the 7th graders are designated a topic to journal about each day. However, Ms. H gets a lot more out of the journals than what the kids think about poetry. They use their journals to talk about their feelings, moods, and struggles. Several of the students' journals she has to monitor closely because he says several things that indicate there might be severe problems at home. Sometimes the students are even recommended for counciling based on what's written in their journals. How some of these students use their journals reflects just how much home life really effects school life. The two are not separate spheres that never intersect, and teachers need to understand that the kid who is always so happy in class may just be wearing a smile, a fake smile that could potentially be detrimental to their emotional well-being.

"Student Teaching"

2006-03-10T09:08:00.000-08:00

I had the best day ever yesterday at observation. Ms. H had a meeting to go to, but her substitute hadn't arrived yet. So she gave me the lesson plan to teach and the substitute (technically I can't teach on my own yet so he had to be there) just sat in the back. I got to teach two different kinds of poetry (diamond and free verse) and help them with verb, adverb, adjective practice. I also gave them a grammar quiz, which I got to grade after class. And I was able to get all of them to actually journal for once. I seriously love grading papers so much and writing in the grade book. Although I didn't change anything about the structure of the class room, I tried to be creative in my lesson plan about poetry. As anticipated, the kids don't like poetry at all. Anything that is presented to them on a deeper level that is not directly stated they give up on. However, I thought it would be a good idea if we wrote a poem together as a class first to get them warmed up. The kids went nuts. There were so many hands flying in the air I didn't know who to call on. After the class example, the kids couldn't wait to write their poems. Most of the time they get embarrassed by their work and don't show anybody except Ms. H. About half of them wanted to read their poem out loud for the rest of the class or they gave it to me to read alound. One of the poems was so beautiful I felt like the wind was knocked out of me as I read it. The boy who wrote it is such a nice kid, but he's so quiet that I didn't realize he had these kind of emotions running through him. As I read it to the class, I saw all of their faces gaping at the words in awe. My students surprise me everyday, and always in the best ways. Even though I'm only supposed to observe from 11:50-12:30, the kids begged me to come back after they had gym and E&R. I used my better judgement and decided that this was worth missing my 2:35 class for. Yesterday, I think my enthusiam for english and poetry rubbed off on the kids (not for adverb practice though--I don't know what would ever make them like that). If I could spend all day there I would. The substitute, who is a young, and rather attractive guy that is going to ISU now trying to get certified, was so helpful. He gave me some good pointers on how to respond to the kids when they're disruptive. He told me that the best way to learn how to become a teacher is to actually teach, and that's what he gave me the chance to do yesterday. It was the best birthday present I could have asked for. Now I feel even more confident in my abilities as a not only an instructor, but as a teacher who can bond with her students.

I like class discussions now...

2006-03-07T09:02:00.000-08:00

Today was a really fun class because we got to sit around together and discuss what we've been observing and doing during our field work. I'm glad that I'm not behind, it seems like most people haven't done too much with their focal student yet and neither have I. The way the other students talked about the kids in their classes showed me that I think almost everyone is having just as much fun as I am in the field. Although I was worried at first, because junior high was such an awful experience for me, I'm finding that it's not so bad. At first, I thought there was no way I would ever want to teach middle schoolers, but the more I observe the more I see that they're not the evil kids that I perceived them to be when I was growing up. Unlike most of the kids in Ed Studies, I wasn't the smart kid when I was young. I never felt embarrassed by high grades or right answers because I didn't have good grades and most certainly never knew the answers. Why I didn't try at all in junior high is something I question frequently. I don't understand how I could have gone from being a straight C student to being a straight A student so fast. I would imagine it stemmed from the fact that I felt like I had nobody because I never had any friends. At the time I was very lonely and scared of all me peers. I would eat lunch with the school nurse so I wouldn't have to face entering the lunch room and sitting alone. This all changed though in high school when I somehow got confidence, began to try and succeed in school, and make friends. One day when some girls on the volleyball team were talking about the "nerdy girls" I told them that I used to be that way. They were utterly shocked that I was similar to the girl they all teased and ostracized. They admitted that they feel bad for the girls that are all alone, but would never make friends with them because they're just too different. It's natural for people to divide themselves into groups. During field observation, I like to study the groups. Studying them helps me to understand how I got into the position I was in when I was 12. No longer am I bitter at middle schoolers, because I realize that they are so mean to each other (I think everyone notices the negative attitudes and animosity they have towards each other) so they can create fronts. The negativity is a wall for the students to protect themselves because I think almost everyone at that age questions who they are and where they belong. They questions relationships with parents, friends, and boy/girlfriends. Now, I can definitely see myself teaching middle school. I love my seventh graders and I can tell that most of the students really like me. I feel good when I teach, I feel like it's where I belong and I feel like I'm always learning and improving. I think almost everyone in my class is getting to that place now, where they feel like they fit in and have something to give to the students.

Nieto Ch 9 and other related things

2006-03-06T09:32:00.000-08:00

That's right, I'm done with my Nieto reading. I haven't been able to blog all weekend though because I went with my friend to her house in the country. If you think Bloomington is small, go to Walnut, Illinois. I do believe they have 945 people. We had to drive about 30 minutes to get to a place to shop, but it was fun and very relaxing. Personally, I couldn't live like that. I prefer the suburbs where it only takes me five minutes to get almost anywhere I need to be. One thing I noticed about the town is that everyone is white. Of course I didn't meet everyone, but in Church, at the bridal store, and a Fudruckers I didn't see any people of color. It got me thinking about chapter nine in Affirming Diversity. The chapter was basically a much-needed overview of multicultural education; sometimes all the concepts thrown at me can be confusing so it's nice to have them laid out again. One of the seven listed aspects of multicultural education that caught my interest was that multicultural education is pervasive. This means that it's "not something that happens at a set period of the day or another subject area to be covered" (Nieto 354). Instead, multicultural education must be included in every aspect of the curriculum and methods of teaching. I remember when I was younger, during Black History Month we would talk about Martin Luther King and read Mississippi Bridge, or another book like it. Although, we had a small population of black students, they were still there. My sister was still in elementary school last year and I went to one of her choir concerts in the school. As I walked down the hall, I saw that the second graders were doing activities for Black History Month. One of the activities was coloring a picture of Dr. King for the teacher to hang up. On the wall I noticed that some of the kids had actually colored his skin white. I chuckled when I saw this, but then I remembered that when ever I drew a picture of kids at school, everyone was white. The teacher was white too. I was, in effect, colorblind because I couldn't see outside my own world. Now that I know a bit more, I think it's so interesting that the children who didn't know who Dr. King was colored him white probably just because they assumed that a great man in history, a famous man worth studying, was white. In my elementary school, we never used multicultural education. It was by no means pervasive, it was just another unit. I liked highschool much more because we were always learning about different groups no matter what time of year. We read Native American, women's, African American, African, Chinese American, etc, literature. It broadened my horizons in ways that my elementary school didn't. I was thinking about my friend's school in the country, what if every kid in the school was white? Would they still need multicultural education and would the kids accept it? I would still say yes. Just because all the kids are white doesn't mean they share the same cultures. Even of they did, learning about different groups of people would help them to see the world through new perspectives. Her school most likely had the same values as multicultural education because even though they lacked community diversity, they always had many foreign exchange students come to study in their classrooms.

3rd Literature Circle

2006-03-02T14:00:00.000-08:00

Today was our third literature circle presentation and it was on Gloria Ladson-Billings' The Dreamkeepers. I thought the group did an excellent job of working together as a team. They were able to think on their feet and were very enthusiastic. I learned some new terminology today as well. Although I've always understood the concept of the descrepancy that happens and must be balanced when one person of a particular culture tries to teach someone of a different culture, I didn't know it was called cultural synchronization. I also learned about cultural relevance, the goal of which is to provide education that students can identify with without making everyone the same. This class is all about embracing diversity while pushing for inegration and Dreamkeepers only reiterates that. When I have more time, I think I will read the book because it sounds like it's actually interesting and not just a rattling off of statistics. That's what I really like about School Girls. I cannot wait for my group to start planning our presentation, I want it to be really creative.

Speaking of creativity, we talked about how crucial it is for teachers to have creative methods while teaching. I think I thought of a good idea to get myself more engaged with my focal student. She just came back from her suspension of 12 days and she has a lot of catching up to do with me and her work. I gave her an assignment today though. I gave her a camera so she could take pictures of everything that's important to her or a part of who she is. She seemed really excited and she's taking it very seriously. I can tell she appreciates that I want to know all about her friends, school feelings, and the sister she looks up to so much. This assignment gives her a way to be creative to. I expect to learn a lot about her from this as she explains all her pictures to me.

Learning Denied Activity

2006-02-28T09:02:00.000-08:00

Class today was interesting...
We started out by getting into groups to work on a Learning Denied worksheet, but then she told me to leave my group and help another one because they were getting behind. I didn't realize that prior to Dr. VEW calling me over to "help" them that she was telling them to be quiet and kept telling them they were slow. When she told me to help them and I saw that they were almost done I felt that any kind of help that I could offer would just be pointless since I knew that these girls weren't slower learners. The girls didn't want our help anyway, the way Dr. VEW was speaking to them made them want to withdraw and give up. After awhile, I figured out that Dr. VEW was picking on them to give us an example of how marginalization works. Instead of allowing the group to go onto more challenging things, she kept them behind by forcing them to finish the worksheet. This same thing happened to Patrick. Initially, when he was labeled as a "slower learner" by the school he psychologically withdrew himself. Only after Taylor began to work with him did he desperately try to catch up; however, he bagan to resist education once he saw that no matter how hard he tried the school wouldn't help him. Dr. VEW pointed out that each of the girls in the group modeled some form of behavior after being marginalized that Patrick at one point displayed. While the oldest girl fought back and eventually gave up out of frustration, another was trying desperately to please the professor and not be a "slow learner." I don't think many of the students in my education class, including myself, have ever been marginalized or have ever been denied learning. I think this exercise was a creative way of shoving in our semi-naive faces the truth about many schools. That many really don't care about a child's abilites and strengths when it's easier to label them as being deficient. As future teachers, it will be our job to crusade against this cruel form of tracking.

How I'm Like the Girls I Studied and Nieto 8

2006-02-27T20:28:00.000-08:00

For this blog I decided to answer one of the topics from the example packet: Describe how your involvement in extracurricular activities has or has not supported your learning and school achievement.

I thought that this would be fun for me to answer because I just gave a presentation on the girl's volleyball team and talked about how they incorporate the competition and drive for excellence that they learn in a team setting into their individual school achievements. Chapter 8 of Affirming Diversity also talks about the contribution of extracurriculars to students' success. Without a doubt, I know that sports can do wonders for one's self-esteem and drive. I don't know what it was about being on the tennis team for four years in highschool that made me try so hard, but it was something very powerful. All through middle school I was never a great student. I rarely got As on anything and I was never on the high honor roll, just the regular one. I was also in all regular-level classes, and started out freshman year in all regular classes. When I got on the tennis team, I was so impressed by all the girls. Almost all of them were in NHS, academic extracurriculars, were on high honor roll, in honors/AP classes, and despite all this, which could have given them huge egos, the girls were so nice and welcoming. As a freshman starting out in a new school with virtually no friends, the tennis players become my social support system. I felt better about going to school everyday because I knew that I would have fun at practice and that one of the juniors would give me a ride home. The girls became my role models, and it made me feel inferior to hear them talk about their advanced classes. It was then that I decided I wanted a piece of that. I worked my butt off in school for the first time ever and I became possessed with desire for "perfection." Although my hard work paid off and I was moved up to almost all honors classes and APs, my mom began to worry about me. If I didn't get an A on a test my day would be ruined. Instead of competing against myself only, I started to compete against my classmates. Being on the tennis team gave me confidence in myself academically, in my social life, and on the court. No longer would I let my "friends" walk all over me, instead I met my best friend ever as well as many new ones. While my competitiveness on the court has only gotten me in trouble a few times, in school I have learned that grades should not be treated the same way. I'm ok with a B now, as long as I know that I tried my best. I defintely owe a huge part of who I am today to the sport I played for so long. Without it, I know I wouldn't be here today so confident in myself and what I want to do with my life. I know that the girls on the volleyball team will meet their goals too because they have supportive parents, friends, and teammates that will help them along the way.

Learning Denied

2006-02-26T17:14:00.000-08:00

Denny Taylor's Learning Denied is the first reading for our class that I have completely enjoyed. I liked this one because it's a thorough case study and I felt like I really got to know Taylor, Patrick, and his parents. Learning about who their family is, outside of the school system, only intensified my belief in that learning should stem from what's learned in the home. I thought that some of the decisions made by the school board in Patrick's state were ridiculous. Rather than paying attention to the opportunities for learning that Pat and Claudia tried to give their son, the school denied Patrick his right to learn and be given a chance when they so quickly "identified" him as disabled. Sometimes it could be perceived that the parent's are just in denial and don't want to admit that their child may have a learning disability, but right from the start Patrick's abilties were questioned and relentlessly tested. Rather than figuring out the reason why Patrick could read so well at home and not at school and then designing a lesson plan that could better meet his educational needs, the school just wanted to explain his difficulties (which really weren't anything obscure) by detecting some "neurological glitch." I find it funny that so many of the observations about Patrick were contradictory. One month he's an independent thinker, the next he takes all of his ideas from the other kids in his group. To me it seems as though they would do just about anything to code Patrick--including overanalyzing and even making up observations in the classroom. If the observations were truly indicative of Patrick's lack of ability, they would have been consistent. The school reasoned that "it's not possible to receive extra help without coding, and coding cannot take place without testing" (Taylor 47). Coding is the term used to describe the process of designating a child for special education services. Basically, his school created problems for Patrick. Instead of focusing on what he could do at home and with the help of Denny, the school focused on what he had trouble with. To work on gross motor movements (what does that even entail?), Patrick sacrificed learning to read and write in his classroom with his peers. Because of all the stress of his testing and retesting and the legal battle, Patrick's self-esteem and drive to learn waned. It's only natural that a child will lose faith in his/her abilties when it appears that those who are supposed to nuture and expand upon the child's abilties believe a disability is present. I'm sure I'll blog about this again, after the class discussion on Tuesday. Still, I think it's important to note that when I'm observing Ms. H's class, she is very aware that children learn in different ways. Everyday I work one on one with specific children, those who need more encouragement and more explanation. Rather than putting them into special ed for not being able to understand directions immediately, Ms. H slows it down for them and gives these particular students a chance to thrive. Students who struggle during in class spelling tests, hustling to keep up with the teacher whose reading the words to the pace of the majority, manage to get perfects when I sit with them out in the hall as they orally spell out the words. Instead of special ed, the students aren't given up on, they're given coaches during their study hall to work with them and push them ahead. This is what Denny Taylor did with Patrick. If she wasn't helping him, since the school wasn't at all, Patrick may never have learned to read or write at all.

Culture Presentations

2006-02-23T08:56:00.000-08:00

I just gave my culture presentation and it did not go the way I planned at all. Since the screen was flipped on it's side, I couldn't read what I had written on the slides and I forgot to analyze the expressions of the team. At least I covered everything I wanted to say in my paper. Still, I'm pretty bummed because I don't see any reason to get so nervous for presentations, yet I consistently am. It's not good when you're so nervous you forget what you want to say. I'm sure I threw in a lot of "likes" and "umms" too...awesome. It's weird, I do fine talking to the students I observe now, but I still can't talk in front of my peers. I played sports when I was younger and I've always believed that I am someone with a lot of confidence. Well, at least it's over.

I thought the other people that went did great. Their presentations were really clear and they had good analysis. I wasn't blown away by any original ideas, but they took their ideas and made them unique. Even though Nicole and I both did athletes, and Laura and Jason both did some form of studying boys, no two presentations were completely alike. I think I'll enjoy watching them more next time...not only because I won't be nervous, but because that screen will be fixed. Now I'm off to observation, I will have to tell my volleyball players that I'm done observing them.

McCarthy Class Discussion

2006-02-22T17:26:00.000-08:00

This blog is making up for the one I planned on doing yesterday. Yesterday in class we discussed the McCarthy reading about the laws and rights that govern our education system. We broke up into small groups and discussed whether education is a right, what tenure is and whether a teacher can be fired, if and when teachers are protected by the first amendment, whether teachers have the right to academic freedom, and if a teacher can be found negligent. My small group was made up of Caroline, Leila, and myself and although we only got through the first two questions, we had some pretty in-depth discussion among ourselves. As a group we decided that education is not a right. Initially we thought that it was the U.S. government who requires education for children up until the age of sixteen. Therefore, we arged that if education were equal, education is a right in that it gives children options rather than forcing them into labor. Thus making it an infringement on one's rights to deny educations. We were wrong though. Education is not a right and it is not a law mandated by the U.S. constitution, rather it is set up and regulated by state governments. All fifty states do provide for free, appropriate education, but "appropriate" is quite vague. Apparently appropriate is the foot of water that floods the hallways of East St. Louis High School. Funding for education comes from property taxes, in areas where property is cheaper, and the standard of living is lowered, the standard for education is also lowered. This renders education as more of a privilege than a right. As most things go, the ones who are already privileged receive the best opportunities the education system can offer while the ones without privilege continue to have little or no opportunity. We defined tenure as a contract that basically guarantees lifetime employment after teaching in the school for a certain amount of time (normally three years.) McCarthy says that as an exemplar, teachers are held more accountable for their actions than are people in other professions. This makes sense, because they have to be good examples for the children seeing as they help instill moral values within those they educate. I would never be a teacher while stripping on the side. However, the limits for teacher privacy and what it means to be an examplar are vague. According to law, teachers have privacy, but it's up to the board to decide if what a teacher says and does inflicts upon a child's development. It says in the article when it comes to the best interests of the teacher versus those of the student, the student's interests are given precedence. While I think it's important to think of the child first, it seems like the board is given way too much leeway in when it can dismiss tenured teachers. Vague reasons they can give for letting a teacher go include incompetency, neglect of duty, immorality, insubordination, and unfitness to teach. Knowing this makes me realize that I have a lot to worry about when I become a teacher. I feel like I'm never really safe because no matter what my actions could be judged negatively. The whole thing sounds like it's one big popularity contest where you have to win the school board's favor as a teacher, even if that means sacrifcing your dignity.

Today in observation we watched the commercials the kids made for their media unit. It was a lot of fun, and some of them were hilarious. The kids all thanked me for taping and told me I did a nice job; they even gave me applause and it was so nice. In one of the commercials I danced badly because the needed an extra who couldn't dance. All of the kids got to see my not-so-serious side and I think that only brings us closer together. They all thought I was brave because I'm not afriad to embarrass myself. I remember middle school, everything is so embarassing and you think everyone's judging you. I was thinking about this today, embarassment is completely socially constructed because if no one's around you're not embarassed. Therefore, if society labels an action as something one should be embarassed by, only then does that action become embarassing.

Tomorrow is my culture presentation. I get nervous speaking in front of people--ironic because I want to be a teacher. I hope it goes ok.

McCarty and McCarthy Readings

2006-02-18T17:00:00.000-08:00

I think that these readings actually gave me lots of useful knowledge for when I become a teacher. First off, I had no idea there is a teacher's union--somehow the fact that my teachers went on strike 5 years ago just went over my head. None of my teachers have ever told me about it before. I'm surprised that all teachers are required to pay union dues even though they don't want to be part of the union. I mean, I'm not too sure what a teacher's union could do for me, but I know that as a union, teachers become stronger. Together they have a voice that is more likely to be heard by the state boards of education. It's nice to know that I will have some protection from unfairness and people to back me up if conditions are unreasonable. I was also surprised by the lack of academic freedom teachers have. I had always assumed the English teachers in the school decided what we would read and write about, what historical events we would delve deeper into in history class, etc. I cannot believe teachers do not have the RIGHT to determine course content. I would think that the teachers would decide what they want to teach and then run it by the board for approval. I guess that explains why almost everyone at some point reads To Kill a Mockingbird and we all know who Emily Dickinson and Robert Frost are. It's nice that teacher's are at least given freedom as to how they teach the content. Method of instruction is what separates the good teachers from the bad, the effective from the ineffective. The various projects and group discussions were what made learning enjoyable. I think that's a part of what makes one kid say they love Huck Finn, and another kid say they hate it.

Speaking of Huck Finn, the part about censorship reconfirmed all of my prior feelings about the issue. I hate the idea of censorship. This could be because I'm not sensitive to issues the way some people are, but I never understood why books like Huck Finn and Madame Bovary were banned. It's very totalitarian-like if you ask me. Just because someone reads Madame Bovary does not mean they will go out and have scandalous love affairs. What does removing controversial books do? It shelters kids from truths that they might do their lives some good. Books like The Bluest Eye and The Color Purple are extremely difficult and painful to read, and yes they have vulgar language, but they're real. They're books that make you feel something. The words slap people in the face and make them wake up to discover the problems society ignores. I agree with McCarthy, the censorship "threatens the school's role in expanding students' intellectual horizons and nurturing respect for diversity."

To me, it's important that kids learn sex education and evolution. Isn't it presumed that a child's values are learned in the home. It's the schools job to uphold these values, but religion is not as much of a value as it is a belief. Not everyone is of the same religion, so why not teach Darwin's theory. There's evidence for it, and the evidence is incredible. Darwin's theory doesn't only explain origins of species, it shows people the power of scientific discovery. Similarly, people argue that sex ed introduces children who are too young to the human body. Thus, children will become curious and will experiment. People are curious by nature anyway, they might as well be safe. Based on DARE and Sex Ed I have found that kids will make up their own minds, and their peers and families influence their decisions more than schools do. From my observation I pick up many things about sex. Some girls are sexually active in the middle school, but most just feel they aren't ready. I think people need to put more faith in kids that they will take the information and think before they act. When are children ready to learn about sex then?...when they're in highschool? (when it's still not legal)...when they're 18? (when it's finally legal). It would make more sense to make special arrangements for students who don't want to participate on an individual level.

One more thing, I know this is getting long, but I'm grateful that this is pretty much a handbook on how to get by and understand my place as a school teacher. While I'm glad that as long as my actions are reasonable I shouldn't fear the law interfering and taking away my job once I become a teacher. I understand my legal responsibilites and the laws now, but I think that many of the reasons for letting teachers go are awful. Sure, in some states teachers don't even have to pass a basic skills test or go through hundreds of evaluation hoops to be certified, but being gay is grounds for termination. Wow, this country preaches equality of opportunity, I wouldn't have guessed that. I understand that we are exemplars for students and that my conduct outside the classroom will be judged, but I think that should apply more to the groups teachers are actively involved in, drug use, and second jobs they may hold (teacher by day, stripper by night?) Reasoning that homosexuality is an impairment of teaching effectiveness is so ridiculous. I cannot beleive the state would ever uphold that complain. Relationships and home life are private matters and what goes on behind closed doors is not a co-workers business.

2nd Literature Circle

2006-02-17T15:45:00.000-08:00

I just haven't been in a blogging mood lately. I've been working on my culture project. I hung out with the volleyball team for three hours yesterday. After talking with a pack of 13 year old girls for such a long time my brain hurt. They gave me lots of insight into their world though, I learned things that I never could have perceived by merely watching them in games. I'll explain more though Thursday. Hopefully it's up to par

Yesterday was also the Life in Schools Literature Circle. I felt that the group did a fantastic job and I liked it more than the first one because this presentation was more interactive. Even though they didn't get through the entire powerpoint, I think the fact that we were able to go in depth and get side tracked shows that we're all becoming better critical thinkers when it comes to philosophizing (is that a word?) about education. Inequality in education is a huge problem, and some really deep questions were raised as to what we can do, what we should do, and if it can be changed. Personally, I haven't figured out all the answers yet but I think I'm getting closer. I don't know if inequality in education can be cured. It seems that, based upon how society has always been structures, there will always be an oppresser and those he, and sometimes she, oppresses. Although people don't admit it, I think many members of society love and thrive on inequality. That's why they separate their kids from minorities and put them in private schools and move to all white neighborhoods. The graphs for the Life in Schools powerpoint show that the rich continue to get richer as the poor become more poor. Not to mention, the laws and education system benefit the wealthy only. My highschool was made up of a pretty wealthy student population, and I never realized it until now, but I think having money was what made us good students. Sure, there were students who didn't try at all because they knew their parents would take care of them for the rest of their lives, but most were insanely smart. My school was so competetive, in one of my honors classes people looked at you like you were stupid of you got below a 30 on your ACT. There was a lot of judgement based upon grades, but who did we do so well for? Our parents?...maybe. Ourselves?...I did...for the most part. The school? -- Yeah I would say it was for them. All over my school were banners saying "GBS: Where Excellence is Tradition." They really made you feel like you were letting down the school and would be breaking tradition if--god forbid--we weren't excellent. They would always talk about how bad our class was--how many times people were caught with drugs at school or drunk in class, all the vandalism, how many of us go thrown in jail senior year (even if only for a night)--but at graduation they kept repeating over and over again how great we were because we gave the school credit for having the highest ACT and AP test averages ever. Nevermind that many of us weren't 'good' people with strong morals--we could test. It was crap. I don't agree with school rankings, but schools do because they determine who receives more funding. Maybe if GBS wasn't loaded, our scores may not have been as good. No way did my school teach to the test-- we didn't have to. I think though, if other schools were as well off as us, they wouldn't have to teach to the test either. While I loved my highschool teachers, I don't think they have to work that hard to turn out "smart kids." When I become a teacher, I want to help the kids that actually need me. I honestly feel like I get to do that while observing too. It makes me feel like I'm doing something that really matters when the kids are so appreciative of my explanations and the extra help I can give them.

A lot of random thoughts that actually pertain to education

2006-02-14T19:52:00.000-08:00

Although I didn't get to say everything I wanted to in my Philosophy of Education, I am so relieved that it's over with. Aside from my frustrations though, I think the class discussion went well today. Racial issues are something over which most people have opinions, and I'm glad people share theirs in class because I always look to be enlightened. I think Laura's story about her mother's student who didn't describe skin color when trying to describe a boy is fascinating. I think of myself as always having been aware of distinctions made between people based on skin color. Also, the classes that are taught half the time in English and half in spanish I have never heard about before. I think that would be very beneficial to have students who speak two different primary languages learning eachothers languages together. I think it would have helped me to learn spanish quicker and would have helped me to remember it better if I had learned Spanish and used it with native speakers. It would also have helped to bridge the gap between the ESL students and people in English and Spanish classes by making them learn together and cooperate rather than separating us. I think the kids in ESL felt very distant from the other students in my highschool because they weren't given many chances to make friends outside their ESL classes. Sure, being together in the ESL class helped them to keep their cultures alive in a school filled predominantly by european american kids with no other culture practiced in their homes besides american culture, but at the same time they probably feel like aliens in a foreign world where they just don't fit. I'm not sure what kind of program the junior high has that I'm observing at, I should look into that. I'm sure it's larger scale than the one at my junior high was.

Also, I had a traumatic experience today. I'm the bad guy in class now. I'm only kidding, but I'm pretty sure some of the students are a little frustrated with me. They're making commercials and the boys wanted to make a commercial selling alcohol and having a scene with a bar fight. Why is it that junior high boys always think fighting and illegial activities are so funny? I had to tell them no, that it wouldn't be appropriate and they were mad and sulked the rest of the time. All the other kids have been doing great on their commercials and have kept on task. I'm filming tomorrow and I cannot wait! Recently I've been thinking about School Girls too. I see a lot of evidence while observing that supports Orenstein's conclusions about the differences between boys and girls. The boys are definitely more commanding in this project, they order me around about where to stand and what props I need to get. The girls are self-conscious. The consistently ask my opinions on whether or not I like their idea, if I think it's the best idea I've heard so far, and they get camera shy when it comes to doing something (such as T's dancing) that could potentially be scrutinized by other classmates. The girls are being much more conscientious about this project. The boys seem like they just don't care. Most don't have scripts written yet! Still, the boys have confidence they will get it together by tomorrow and still do well. I'm fascinated by the confidence gap between the sexes, mainly because it's something that affects all of us. From watching the girls volleyball team, I can really see how sports do improve self-esteem because as a team the girls are confident in what they can do. I'm looking forward to presenting my culture project. Everything I'm learning right now is tying in nicely to help me make my ultimate conclusions.

It's Been Awhile

2006-02-12T21:36:00.000-08:00

Ok so I haven't blogged in awhile but that's only because not too much has happened. I wrote my philosopy of education and I'm not too happy with it to be perfectly honest. Right now I have five pages and I have to scale it down to three, but there's so much that I want to say that it's so frustrating thinking about what I need to cut out. Stylistically it's not anything to be proud of. I can write better than what I'll be turning in Tuesday, hopefully I can do a massive cleanup job. Writing is the one area where I am so perfectionistic I get ulcers. For something as simple as a three page paper I will sit at my computer for hours rearranging my thesis statements. In the end it's worth it though, when you can read through what you've written and you feel so accomplished. For me finishing a paper is the best feeling in the world.

I'm pumped that we didn't have any reading this weekend, it was nice to have that break for a change. I feel like everything I have to do for this class has been smushed into February which makes this cold and blah month even more bitter.

Bad news in the field to. My profile student was suspended for ten days. It has been bothering me a lot because I know she's a good kid. Ms. H told me that I should pick a new student to study, but I don't want to. I'm sticking with H. because it's clear that she'll really need a friend, as well as a tutor when she comes back. When her friends told me about her suspension right after lunch, they seemed so disappointed, because this means H can't do the commercial she's been so excited about (the one the girls practice their lines in the halls for). The girls made it seem as though H. felt like she let me down. I hope she knows that this doesn't change how I feel about her. When something like this happens to a student, I think it's important for teachers to treat the student the same when they come back. Otherwise the teacher-student relationship becomes unomfortable and he student is left with overwhelming guilt and a feeling that they are not wanted in the school. When H. comes back, I hope to find out what she learned from her experience. I wonder if it will change her? Ten days is a long and lonely time to think about things. I'm just hoping that when she comes back she'll be able to talk to me with the same ease she always has, because I honestly care about this girl and I hope I can help her and maybe be a role model- if I am even a good person to model..

Changing my mind...perhaps?

2006-02-08T18:55:00.000-08:00

In yesterday's journal entry I gave explanations for why some students succeed and other fail that were far too simplistic. Of couse I wrote it before I read chapter seven of Nieto, a chapter all about the fact that no one reason can accout for the achievement gap. I took a stab at making my own theories, one of them was mentioned by Nieto as a possiblility, but she quickly proved that it could not account for all situations and that social inequality could not possibly be the only explanation for failure. This class always teaches me new things, whether through reading texts (which is how I personally learn best) or through class-lectures, I always find new concepts to apply when working with my seventh graders. After completing the readings for this week, my philosophy if education has changed a little bit again as I incorportate new ideas and take out ones that I just don't like anymore. One thing that Nieto brought up, which to me is the most important thing a teacher can do, is the power of caring. I love how she pointed out that caring isn't necessarily being the student's best friend too. The most caring teachers are those who have high expectations for us and encourage us along the way. One thing that I made sure of doing when I started observing Ms H's class was learning all the kids' names. I remember when I was in middle school, and it would be half-way through the year and my teachers would still call me "girl in the back with the blond ponytail." I always swore I would never do that to my students. By not knowing their names it shows that a teacher really doesn't care about how the students are doing on tests or what they say during class discussions. I can tell the kids like that I can refer to all of them by name and recongize them as I walk through the lunchroom. Often, it's the class troublemakers that get all the attention, I consciously try to talk to everyone in the class and let them know that I know who they are and that I care that they're a part of 'my' class (really Ms. H's). Ms. H shows she cares a lot about her students too. She knows all about their families, what kind of students they are, who they're friends with, and what activities they do. I don't look at that as being nosy, she just informs herself on who she's teaching and where they come from.

Yesterday during observation I had one of the most rewarding experiences since I started observing Ms H's class. Since they're doing and advertising unit, the students are going to write and perfrom a public service announcement which I will film and turn into a commerical. I worked with L, A, and H (my profile student) and they threw out a lot of great ideas and worked better as a team than I or Ms. H have ever seen them work. They decided they wanted to do a PSA to get kids to stop smoking that would be serious and factual. They wanted their personal opinions to be heard and all the girls made it quite clear that thye believe smoking is extremely bad for one's health and "stupid." The girls wanted to show that many people beleive that everybody smokes, and the bandwagon technique is what sucks many kids into the addiction. But in the end they wanted their message to be that everybody does NOT smoke, in fact the majority of the population doesn't. When they communicated with eachother what theire lines would be in the script, I wrote down what they said. When it was over they performed it by reading it, then they wanted to perform it a second time. The second time they elaborated on what I had written. They put everything into their own words and used African-American slang, or whatever term is culturally correct when defining differences in African-American jargon vs. standard English. When they used their own words, especially when Latoya went on a rant about how dumb she felt cigarettes were, the script came to life. They were no longer actors to me, but real kids making choices for themselves. All the books say that African American teens have much more confidence than European American teens. I can see evidence of this everyday. The L, A, and H don't worry as much about what people think of them and I love how they say what they feel. After class, when I was walking down the hall the girls were in a group with friends from another class practicing the script yet again. I've never seen them more proud of themselves and as excited abotu schoolwork. I think it's because they were able to create something entirely their own about something that they actually care about. Their enthusisam only adds to my enthusiasm. For once I feel like I'm in the right place, doing the right thing and that I'm acutally doing a good job. Just as much as I encourage the students and remind them of their successes, the students remind me of my achievements and how far I've come already.

First Literature Circle

2006-02-07T09:08:00.000-08:00

I enjoyed class a lot today actually. Scott, Cassandra, Lauren, and Greg presented Jonathan Kozol's Savage Inequalities and did awesome. I'm glad that I didn't have to be in the first group, after watching them I now have a better understanding of what I'm supposed to do for 75 minutes in front of the class when I present School Girls. The information they gave in class basically just restated and gave examples of what I hear constantly about education in my social problems class and in the ed. studies text book: schools are still segregated and unequal. The inequalities are quite savage indeed. It's ridiculous that New Trier spends twice as much per student as all Chicago schools do. These inequalities teach us that money is everything. Without money, one can't go to a school with teachers who are as qualified or technology as up-to-date as one could in a more affluent neighborhood. The reasons why New Trier's average ACT and graduation rate is so much higher than East St. Louis is not that white people are born smarter, it's that we're more likely to grow up in affluent neighborhoods and thus have better schools. Since race is socially constructed, I would say that the inequalities in education are due class differences (which are merely correlational, not causational, with race differences). The gaps between the rich and the poor, white people and minorities, and the well-educated and the illiterate are only getting wider. Now is a time when we as a society are segregated more than ever before. We need to do more than desegregate. We should integrate all cultures, without dissolving them completely. Maybe we can never be without class issues, because as long as there are corportations there will be people on the top and people on the bottom. We can rid ourselves of race issues though, it's not impossible, but it is a difficult task. People first have to want to accept that whites won't be the majority forever in the United States. Over time we will be forced to integrate: live, work, and play side by side with all different kinds of people. More and more inegration is happening in this town, I can see it in the junior high. Suburban schools are not only for white kids anymore, but it's clear that the changes haven't quite been accepted yet and that is why all the black kids sit together at lunch. I believe that all this will change one day, and all the kids will sit together regardless of race. This isn't saying that there won't be divisions though- there are still the popular kids, the rich kids, the BD kids. No matter what kind of social groups we branch off into, I'm pretty sure they will always exist and there will always be inequalities between them due to how our ecomony is structured all how the might dollar rules all.

Yay for Bilingual Education

2006-02-05T12:43:00.000-08:00

Does anyone else feel like this class owns their life? I feel completely overwhelmed right now by the culture project, philosophy of education, and lit circles, not to mention the pages upon pages of reading. I'm normally a pretty organized person, but right now I really am not seeing a way where I can get all this done without losing my sanity completely. I read chapter six of Nieto two days ago, but this is the first opportunity I've had to actually sit down and blog about it.

Actually, reading the chapter fed my mind with ideas for what I'll write about in my philosophy of education paper concerning students who use English as a second language. We've established in class, and I think most of us agree, that the knowledge we acquire in school lessons should build off of a foundation of basic skills that we already have. Nieto points out in the chapter though that we acquire knowledge through the language and culture in which we were raised. For children who speak Spanish as their primary language, they learned in an environment contextualized by their culture and language. When these Spanish speakers get catapulted into the American educational institution, where English rules all, they are really being thrown into a learning environment based upon a culture that they don't recongnize. When people immigrate to the U.S., I think it's crucial that they maintain their original culture in addition to embracing a new one. If you lose your culture, you lose who you really are, and it can break up a family (the most important institution). In order to keep the original language, and not just replace it with English, in an ESL class, I am all for bilingual education. More specifically, I like the two-way bilingual model that Nieto brings up. The idea of integrating students who are learning English with students who already speak English is, to my belief, the best way to develop bilingual proficiency and more accepting cultural attitudes. Consistently in the case studies, the immigrant students report feelings of inferiority in American schools. Not only because they don't think anyone understands them, but also American values and norms are contradictory to those of many other countries. Through the cooperative learning and peer tutoring that the two-way bilingual model presents, the students would be able to share skills with eachother. They say the best way for a learner of Spanish to become fluent is for them to spend a semester abroad. I think the same is for English learners. By having them learn along side English speaking peers their own age, they can still learn in their own language, but can practice talking in English. Similarly, the English speaking students, learning Spanish, could benefit from the tutoring of Spanish speaking students by practicing Spanish while studying. Another benefit of this approach is that by cooperatively working together English speaking students and English learning students could learn about eachother's cultures, develop appreciations for differences, and embrace the new perspectives that diverse cultures raise. There is evidence that being bilingual renders students with more chances for academic achievement and with better adjustment skills. Just as most schools think it's important for those with English as their first language to learn a second language, it's crucial that those who knew another language before English continue to know and use it. In the end, it would make them happier because their cultural identities would be maintained.

I am so tired...

2006-02-02T18:54:00.000-08:00

Today was quite a busy day for me and education. This morning we had class and we talked about the latest chapter in Nieto's Affirming Diversity. We spent a lot of class time talking about"color blindness" and whether or not we should recognize race in the classroom. I agree with what Dr. VEW and all the text books say, race is a socially constructed idea. It was created for the purpose of grouping and discriminating. However, because it has been defined for so long, I see race and I don't think that will ever change. When I say I see race, I mean when I first meet someone, I will recognize their skin complexion. The classroom and pedagogical techniques should be culturally constructed. It is because of culture, Nieto and Delpit point out, that different people have different learning styles.

They point out that with African American kids, teachers have to be more direct with instructions. If you imply you want work done, beg, or pose it as an option, an African American child is less likely to respect you and will therefore not do it (most of the time they say---they're careful not to make generalizations for all groups.) I notice that Ms. H does this in her classroom and I tried it today when I was working one-on-one with an African American student. Without trying to be bossy or bitchy I made sure I was very clear when working with her that we were going to get work done. I think my assertiveness made Shanequa even more efficent in making her vocab flashcards and she tried really hard on her parent letter. When working with her on the letter, Shanequa did something that I liked a lot. She seemed lost on where to go with it because she had missed school so I gave her suggestions. Instead of just copying all my suggestions and repeating my words verbatum, she elaborated, cut out what I said that she didn't like, and used her own writing style. To be blunt-she talked black in her letter- and it was beautiful. Alice Walker and Toni Morrison don't write in old English for a reason--the power of the words would lose their effect. Shanequa told me she's moving mid-February. I hate this--just when I start to bond with a kid and have them open up to me--they have to move. She seems really upset about it, but she says in the end it's her mom's choice. As corny as this may sound, I have become attached to these kids in a very short time. Even though they're Ms H's classes and students, I feel like they're mine too. I think that's why I asked if I could come everyday, I've become really attached. Before this class I thought I was unbiased. In truth, I had plans of teaching highschool at a predominantly white suburban school where the kids already had work ethic and amazing grades. I didn't want to teach and support students as much as I wanted to mold and refine skills. This class has changed me. What I wanted before wouldn't be helping people. I want to be like Ms. H. I want to take a chance, have a diverse school where kids struggle and need qualified teachers. Before this class, I was afraid of black culture, because I didn't understand it. I don't have a perfect understanding yet, but I have discovered, through actually talking to the kids, that my black students are the most real people in the school. They're themselves, and they take pride in telling it like it is. In my highschool, I always thought the black kids were "loud and ghetto." I prove Delpit right--I used to define an entire culture by a few examples. I regret how I used to act in highschool. I wish I could do it differently. I'm trying to make up for it now I think. I really just want to understand and I'm having a great time learning about their lives and having them learn about mine. I really rambled...sorry for anyone who had to read that. I just feel empowered.

Aside from my little inspirational speech right there I have one more bit of news. I went to the seventh grade girls volleyball game today. They won 22-20, 21-19!! Alina was amazing, spiking all over the place. She's a sweetheart and she introduced me to her coach so now I'm doing my culture project on the team. I can't wait!! I swear, I've become a seventh grader again.

ISBE Standards

2006-01-31T18:41:00.000-08:00

So I found out today that I can't use the lunchroom for my student culture analysis. I will observe the girl's volleyball team instead so I can learn about teamwork, competition, and frienship building/ bonding.

I researched the Illinois State Board of Education's goals/standards for competency in Language arts in middle/junior high school. For reading the generic expectations are as follows:
1. Apply word analysis and vocabulary skills to comprehend selections.
2. Apply reading strategies to improve understanding and fluency.
3. Comprehend a broad range of reading materials.
For writing:
1. Use correct grammar, spelling, punctuation, capitalization and structure.
2. Compose well-organized and coherent writing for specific purposes and audiences.
3. Communicate ideas in writing to accomplish a variety of purposes.

There were more goals listed for Literature, Listening and Speaking, and Research. For last night's homework Dr. VEW asked us to bring in an article on standards, the results I found for reading were quite disheartening. Since 1992, reading proficiency among fourth-eighth graders has only risen 2%--to 31%. NCLB calls for 100% proficiency by 2014. With statisitics like that--such stagnant progress--it seems highly unlikely to me that Bush's goal will be met.

From what I see in my observations of Ms. H's class, it seems like the curriculum has been laid out for her and she chooses how she will teach it. I beleive this because they go through units where they have an overarching theme for every two weeks--currently it's advertising and media--and the tie this theme into journal writing, spelling words, vocabulary, and grammar corrections (e.g. underlinging magazine titles). While I agree with ISBE that their goals are important ones for students to meet during their education process, I think some goals are more important than others and should thus be stressed more in the classroom. Personally, I think it's more important for readers to comprehend the meaning of a poem than it is for them to know what symbolism and allusion are (although knowing these devices does help.) I also believe that the ability to communicate ideas through writing is more important than impeccable grammar. When I think of the word standard, I assume it's something that applies to everyone. The way people measure how standards are being met is through testing. Here is where I have the problem. I don't like standardized tests, I don't know what would be a better option, I just know that they have to go. I absolutely agree that they are biased and I think that NCLB taking away school funding for lack of meeting standards is beyond foolish. Personally, I think all schools should get equal funding. In areas where property taxes are high, they don't need as much of the government's money as other school districts do. If all schools had equal opportunity to have qualified teachers (same salaries for starting-out teachers), up-to-date technology, quality buildings, and newer materials the education system would be getting closer to becoming less biased.

Currently, most of the kids I work with I believe are meeting the standards for seventh grade. The few that aren't will be repeating 7th grade again next year, or are in grave danger of being held back. I think the kids are doing so well because Ms. H has such high expecatations for all of them and she really makes each child feel like they can succeed. Although I don't see her culturally distinguishing different students through different teaching methods, whatever she's doing seems to work. In her class it's not the African American or Latino kids that are being left behind and I believe it's because there is no tracking in Language Arts and Ms. H's emphasis on everyone's potential. However, with me there she does make special accomodations for students who need extra help. I think it's important that she accounts for students' different learning styles. No standardized test is able to take that into consideration.

The Beginning of a Beautiful Friendship

2006-01-30T17:02:00.000-08:00

Today was yet another day of observation. I finally was assigned to a child for the profile assignment, for pseudonym purposes I shall call her Jane. It was actually at her request that I profile her, which the teacher hopes will give her motivation to come to class more often than she does. Today I also arranged it with Ms. H that I will come everyday for 40 minutes to observe instead of every other day. Due to the block scheduling, I can only see a particular class every other week. I think it would be best if I saw them everyday, that way I never miss a week of talking with Bobo or helping the kids. Some people may think it's weird that I want to put in more time that I probably have on my hands, but I have fallen in love with this responsibility even though it's not that big. I hope Ms. H doesn't get sick of me though and think I'm annoying because I always want to be there.

When I walked into class today at my usual time of 11:35- 15 minutes early so I can organize myself before the kids come in- Jane and LaToya were eating lunch at the table I normally observe from. I asked the girls if I could sit with them and they happily gave me an open chair. Talking with them was much easier than I expected. I thought that the kids might still be alittle shy and afraid to tell me their feelings, but LaToya and Jane had no problem pouring their hearts out. I learned about them more in 15 minutes than I do about many people on my floor who I've lived with for five months now. The girls were so genuine when they talked to me and I can't see how people would label these girls as anything but sweethearts. I learned many interesting things from the girls, things that Nieto hits on in her book.

Jane has dreams of going to college one day. She said she either wants to go to IWU one day or Hartland, where her sister goes. But she says she'd really go anywhere as long as she got a scholarship. I asked if she played any sports, and she said that she loves volleyball and basketball. Because she is so tall and athletically, she would be great on the teams at school. However, she says she can't be on the team because the coaches say she needs an "attitude adjustment." She rolled her eyes when she told me this, as if she's heard it many times before. Bobo doesn't believe she needs an attitude adjustment, and although I haven't been observing very long, she never gives Ms. H trouble when I'm there. I wonder what telling a child they need an attitude adjustment does to their self-esteem? I don't remember being the most pleasant of individuals when I was a middle-school, in fact my mom remembers me being downright bratty and selfish. Sure there are two sides to every story. Maybe Jane needed to be told that her behavior was inappropriate. I think though that the incident made Jane lose respect for the coaches whom she claims she "really doesn't like," and I'm sure she lost this respect because she thinks they don't respect her. The girls also openly told me that they like school and the learning aspects but they don't like "this school"--meaning the teachers. In fact, they ranked all their teachers and agreed with eachother on which were the best and "awesome" and which were "absoulutely horrible." Ms. H topped both their lists. I can see why. She makes it evident that she cares a lot about the kids and wants them to be great in life. Ms. H respects the kids and they respect her and that is so important in a student-teacher relationship. I think many teachers there believe in the philosophy the the teacher teaches and the students are taught. The kids enjoy group work and cooperative learning, not boring lectures. I didn't see how avoiding lectures was possible before, but it really is. For example, they learned new spelling words today and instead of just merely hearing them, each kid made a poster with images from newspapers and sentences using the word. I think Jane will be great to talk to and I hope I can help her with her struggles in school and life. I know this is her second time in the seventh grade, and that the teachers are concerned because there's suspicion she's involved in a gang. Hopefully I can help her raise her grades and her self esteem. Maybe she'll open up to me about the gangs and I can help. I just want her to realize that if she works hard she can do anything she wants.

The most interesting thing I learned today was from LaToya though. She told me she passes by IWU everyday because she goes with her mom to pick up her dad from work at the hospital. LaToya told me that she really doesn't like school, but her dad pushes her to do well and encourages education. She told me that he doesn't want her to end up like him, because he didn't finish highschool. She said, "sure he has a job in the hospital, but he's not a nurse or a doctor or nothing...he works in the cafeteria." LaToya isn't embarrassed by her dad's unfinished education, in fact, I think she's proud of him. From what she says, it sounds like he's just trying to be the best dad he can possibly be. He wants more for his kids than he has. I hope LaToya really understands what her father is saying, I hope she graduates from highschool and wants to go to college like Jane. Most only achieve as high as their aspirations.

Nieto Ch 4

2006-01-28T17:00:00.000-08:00

So I just finished the readings for this weekend and I surprisingly got a lot out of them. I wanted to talk about only one of the practices that directly influences inequities in the class room though, and that is retention. "Retention is the practice of holding students back a grade." Retention decisions are often made as a result of test scores, scores that indicate a student is "incapable of performing the work that is required in the coming grade."

For observation on Friday, the students took a quiz in which they had to identify 16 grammatical errors in a essay. She sent three children, Frank, Megan, and Brandon, back to work with me in a group on the quiz because all three consistently perform poorly on the quizzes. I felt that it was my job to initiate the group cooperation and suggest a strategy for figuring out how to find and correct the errors. I told all of them to write on the side of the paper, next to each paragraph, how many errors Ms. H said the paragraph had and what they were. That was they could check at the end if they missed any. Right from the start Brandon only half-listened. I tried to encourage him to think independently (but with the group), but he just saw this as an opportunity to copy. I thought it would be best for the kids to build on what they had been practicing in class to see what they remembered about underlining and capitalization. Megan asked me why magazne titles are underlined. I never thought about it myself, I just assumed ok it's a rule I have to follow it. I explained to her that because it's a major published work, people underline it to show it's importance. Underlining is a way of giving credit to an author and showing the work's significance. Next, for finding where the commas went I had each of the kids read a sentence aloud while the others listened for where the pauses in speech were. Megan and Frank caught on quickly and sometimes Frank would respond too quickly, not giving anyone else a chance. This is surprising actually because most other teachers in the school think Frank doesn't really care or try. From the two times I have worked with him on a more individual basis he really does well. Brandom however was on a completely different page. Despite Frank's urging him to try because "you need the grade man," Brandon was content letting Megan and Frank do all the thinking. For the last correction, a colon, I singled out Brandon and wouldn't let the other two answer. He didn't know what it was for, so I explained that a colon was used before someone makes a list. He ended up doing it correctly. Then I made him explain it to Frank, Megan, and his other classmates because the best way to learn something is by teaching it to others. I also gave him examples of other kinds of lists that colons could be used for and he caught on quickly.

When it came time to take out the homework from the night before though, Brandon was the only person in the class who didn't do it. I asked him what and he told me he forgot. I suggested his assignment notebook, which was completely blank, and I wrote down the assignment for him so he could have all the details right in front of him. He told me he would do it at home, but Ms. H gave him the opportunity in class to get it done and he wouldn't. It was then that I realized he wasn't going to do it at home either even though he told me he would.

It wasn't until after class that I actually learned about Brandon. Based off his first two quarters, he will be repeating the seventh grade next year. Now I see why he really doesn't care and has no desire to try. Why try when you think it won't matter anyway? To me Brandon epitomizes everything Nieto says about retention. "It makes it easier for them to quit" and it affects "academic achievement, attendance, and attitudes toward school." This explains why Brandon never attends a complete week of school and why he claims everything is "stupid." Although I understand why Brandon is acting the way he is, I'm not going to give up. I'm going to continue helping him as though he is going on to eighth grade next year and needs to have the skills. I really think it's best for me to pretend like I don't know this about Brandon, because if I gave in and allowed him to stop trying I would just be another person form him to believe stopped caring about him. I hope he's signed up for Coaches. He seems like he could really use a good tutor, mentor, and friend.

The Best Part of this Class is Observation

2006-01-26T09:43:00.000-08:00

I've begun to do more things to help Ms. H out during observation. I like the responsibility and the fact that she trusts me to interact with the kids. It can't be easy to be a teacher and have a pattern all year and then have this college kid come to observe you. I try not to be a burden, but I know that she's had to alter her lesson plans a little to accomodate me. I hope she knows how much I appreciate her giving me the opportunity to observe and take part in her class. I like Ms. H a lot, I can tell the kids do to. It amazes me how much she knows about the kids. If I ask a question about a student, she can wthout a fail give me almost their entire life story. She knows which kids in the class come from abusive and impoverished, and she knows who comes from affluent communities and has well-educated parents. I think it's important for teacher's to know more about kids than simply what grade they're getting in their class. Because Ms. H knows about the kids, she can more easily give them support and show that she genuinely cares. From the way she presents herself in class, it's easy to see why the kids love her and have come to trust her. She doesn't take crap from anybody either. When the kids tease eachother, she stops it immediately. She told me that one boy transferred out of the class because, one day when there was a substitute, the other boys in the class ganged up on him and beat him up. Now he's in a different class where he can feel safer. In junior high, it's not always easy to tell who your true friends are. It's important that these kids have a teacher with whom they not only feel safe from taunting, but special and worthwhile. Through pieces of candy and stickers, Ms. H rewards high achievement on quizzes, tests, and homework. It's not a bribe though because if kids don't want to do their work, a piece of candy isn't going to make them. When kids prove themselves to be scholars and critcal thinkers though is when Ms. H really unleashes the positive sanctions. For example, yesterday Alexa got fourth place in the spelling bee and Ms. H made sure everyone in the class recognized Alexa's accomplishment and clapped for her. Ms. H gives her students confidence and encouragment to do well. These motivators are some of the best things teachers can give to students, especially students with low self-esteem.

I'm not sure if they're school rules posted around the room, Ms. H's rules, or a combination of both, but the room is covered with posters that set guidelines for behavior in the classroom. Most of the rules encourage respectfulness, honesty, and equality. Although Nieto pointed out that most teachers call on white boys more frequently than other students, Ms. H calls on all her students equally. I think the goal of the junior high is for all the students to embrace the diversity and see the strengths they will develop as people because of it. I think that's why I haven't come across tracking in the English department yet. All in one class there's Alexa, described by Mr. Jones as freakishly smart, Fernando, my partner who loves art more than anything but still does satisfactory schoolwork when he's pushed, and Alex, a boy who is in 7th grade for the second time. Despite differences in the students' grades and levels of achievement, putting them all in a class together and setting the same expectations shows all the students' in Ms. H's class that they have the same potential. I would have loved to be a student at the junior high. I can tell the teachers really care, and I like that tracking isn't evident. If it was, I think there would be much more separation of social classes and races. The people in the basic classes would continue to be the lowest scoring group while the honors kids would continue to be the highest. I like how the junior high doesn't lock people into positions based on labels, it gives all kids a chance to change their study habits and excel to higher levels. I never thought about teaching junior high before, but now I'm seriously considering it. The kids may be a bit more immature, but I like a challenge. I've come to really like the kids and I enjoy talking to them and helping them out in any way I can. Mr. Jones said they were going to recruit me and make me a part of their team and that made me feel good. I think other teachers can tell how much I really want to be a teacher and how much effort I put into my work.

Last thought: I think I want to do my culture presentation on the lunch room. It's such a bustling place and it's packed full of behaviors I can analyze. It's a social haven and a researcher's dream when it comes to discovering interesting topics to cover. That would be fun though, eating lunch with the kids a few days a week.

Nieto Ch 3

2006-01-25T19:51:00.000-08:00

I finally finished chapter three of Nieto--it was so long. What I like about Nieto's writing is that for everything she says, she has evidence to back it up. She sites other education expects and the results of their studies in addition to her own case studies. In my opinion, her evidence gives her arguments more credibility. That was my problem with Dewey and Friere, all they did was list off their beliefs about education without giving me sufficient facts as to why I should be persuaded to feel the same way. For me the case studies are interesting because I get to hear what the interviewees say in their own words, in addition to hearing Nieto's conclusions based on what the students say and what she observes. While reading about the lives and feelings of Linda, Rich, and Vanessa I was analyzing them and Nieto and I came to a lot of the same conclusions. Especially for Rich's case study. My absolute favorite part was at the end of each case study: the questions for reflection. The questions establish the perfect layout for blogging. One question that I really want to address for today's entry is...

"Think about the schools with which you are familiar. Have you seen evidence of racism or other forms of discrimination? Was it based primarily on race, gender, class, language, sexual orientation, or other differences? How was it manifested?"

Well...I'm only familiar with two schools and those would be the one I attended middle school at and the junior high I am currently observing. For the middle school I attended, there was definitely racism present. This trend continued into highschool too. I guess it all really begins in middle school though, and it's mainly due to tracking and the tendency for kids to establish themselves in groups. The tracking affected everyone though, not just the minorities. The district I grew up in was made of of many wealthy communities and a few poorer communities. Until middle school I had no idea who the smart kids were because they didn't separate us. In 6th grade though we were assigned to different math, lit, reading, and science classes based on ability. I was always in the regular classes, not honors, but not basic. I remember that I was so jealous though when the honors math class got to participate in a trial SAT test to see how they could perform on a HIGHSCHOOL MATH TEST. I was embarrassed that I couldn't brag like the other kids and say that I took it. The worst thing was in eighth grade when the honors lit classes were reading 1984. For a class project they took on roles of what it would be like to be in the "inner party." They all wore black and it was required that they weren't allowed to talk to anyone who wasn't in the "inner party" on the playground. While I knew that it was just something the teacher designed to help the kids better understand the book, which really was a good idea to get the kids excited about reading it, I was envious. Basically, the kids wearing all black were the smart ones and the rest of us, although regular, saw ourselves as dumb. I really do believe in the self-fulfilling prophesy. Because I was basically told by a standardized test that I wasn't "gifted," I really believed that I wasn't smart enough to do honors math or read honors literature. Although I somehow managed to be in all honors classes and perform well in highschool, I used to get low Bs and Cs consistently in middle school even though I "tried." What made me change was the realization that being smart, for most people, wasn't natural. I realized that to get good grades took a lot of hard work. Hard work is how I was able to change my school success around. If I didn't realize the power of ambition and effort, I would not be going to this university. Racism, I noticed, was more of a social thing in my middle school. I remember the lunchroom so well. There was literally a black table, a middle-eastern table, a asian table, and about 10 white tables (all separated by social status and gender). In middle school we did not embrace diversity at all. I remember my "friends" at the time would talk about how the African-American kids "are so loud and obnoxious." We didn't understand the African-American kids, and I think we were afraid to try. All but a few were in the lowest level classes, many were in the BD classes, and I was honestly afraid. That may sound racist, but I don't believe I was racist at the time, I think I was just uncomfortable. I just wanted to stay out of the African-American kid's ways because I knew that if you made them mad they weren't afraid to yell at me. In middle school I thought everyone hated me though, so I just tried to be a people-pleaser as best I could. I realize that everyone stuck with those of their same race because people want to hangout with who understands them best. Consequently, almost everyone in that group is alike because in middle school kids just want to fit in and be accepted. I was friends with average kids who didn't care about school, thus I was an average kid. My sister, on the other hand, was much more outgoing and she was one of the popular girls. Because other girls in her group had expensive clothes and boyfriends, she had to be the same. From a young age, kids label eachother. I think many teachers see these labels and use them too. From these labels arises discrimination. Due to sterotyping, kids are tracked and as assigned expectations. As Rich said, white teacher's expect less from African-American kids. I saw this all the time. Until the day comes when teachers expect from all kids the same things, kids will have differing expertations for themselves. When I have a diverse classroom, I plan on pushing all kids regardless of race, to all be high achievers. They may hate me for it, or think I'm a tough teacher, but when the times comes when we show those that have been oppressed that they're equals, they will realize that they really do have just as much potential as anybody else.

A Little Bit of Research...

2006-01-24T20:38:00.000-08:00

My favorite part about the class discussion today was talking about the demographic trends, trends that have changed and will continue to change the institution of education as we know it. First off, I learned a new term today: the "graying" of education. I didn't know there was an actual name for the teachers who aren't so up-to-date. I love how we refer to them like they're old technology or something. While I do agree that older generations of teachers may not be used to or comfortable with emerging diversity (racial and economic) in their classrooms, I don't see why people would want to push for their retirement. I had old and crotchety highschool teachers, but I loved most of them. They tell the best stories and they have such profound wisdom, wisdom that takes about 30 years of experience to earn. What I liked about my older teachers was that they really pushed me, they weren't there to be my friend, just my educator. Especially with old history teachers, I would love it when they wouldn't just rattle off facts about blacklisting or The Korean War, they could actually tell about it (and not just say they were babies when it happened). Today's society doesn't respect the elderly enough, and we're one of the only societies that don't. Most others develop a social hierarchy with elders at the top, it's elders' experience that makes them vital assets to the community.

I also did some research on ASCD.org...not a bad website. I found out a lot about the new legislation for educating those with disabilities. The 1975 Education for All Handicapped Children Act (Public Law #42) required "a free and appropriate education with related services for each child in the least restrictive environment possible, and an Individualized Education Program (IEP) for each qualifying child. Later, in 1991, "the bill was renamed the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) and the revision broadened the definition of disabilities and added related services. " Ever since inclusion has become a controversial and much-debated topic. Opponents feel that the presence of children with disabilities holds students without disabilities and that special-needs students wouldn't benefit from inclusion because they need more personalized education. "Advocates of inclusion argue that all students are better served in structured inclusive classrooms—that children with disabilities receive more understanding and respect from their peers and that all students profit from working together." Either I'm not understanding something or this is contradictory. I think they're talking about mainstreaming the students with disabilities into the same classrooms and with the same teachers as those students without disabilties. Doesn't this defeat the purpose of the IEP though (which I'm all for)? IEP designs a program of teaching in which lessons are designed that best suit the child with the disability. In in my highschool's district there were four highschools and only one, mine, had a special education program. Based on this act I don't believe my school was following the law. The special ed students only attended classes, except electives like foods and photography, with other students in the special ed program. They were virtually segregated from the rest of us. Their lockers were in a different wing, as was their hallway of classrooms. They didn't even have gym outside the special ed class. I know my school used the IEP methods. Parents would meet with teachers and aministrators and frequently have meetings about the progress of their children. I can't help but think though that if they were mainstreamed, they would have a hard time in classes with average kids.

Only one time did I have a class with a boy who was autistic. He was in my math class, and while he was extremely gifted, he was disruptive and mainstreaming him didn't serve the purpose it was supposed to. He was disruptive of our class, and while we all found it amusing, the teacher didn't when he would shout out answers during quizzes or have emotional breakdowns when he couldn't remember how to solve a problem during a test. While my fellow students and I loved having Sam in our class, I think he always felt like an outsider. I think he knew he was different from the rest of us, but his parents wanted him to be in regular classes so bad that they didn't think about how huge the social aspects of school are. Despite the fact that special education classes may work at a slower pace since they have to account for all the different needs the children that are in them have, I think it's still very beneficial. I also think that it's important that they have special education classes in which all the kids with disabilties can make friends and be socialized. One-on-one education may be more efficient, but mass education has it's perks too. I don't know much about educating those with disabilties though, maybe I'll change my mind with more hands on experience.

I Can't Believe Ace is Gone...

2006-01-24T19:04:00.000-08:00

That title has nothing to with education really, but I was watching The Gauntlet II on MTV and one of my favorite guys got booted off. What happened was his team lost the challenge because he forgot to release the clutch or grab the clutch (or whatever you do with the clutch when driving stick-shift) while the truck was in neutral. Thus, they couldn't push the truck full of cinder blocks (which was what the challenge required them to do). I was shocked by Ace's mistake. He even vounteered himself because he's been around cars, cars with stick shift, for so long. It got me thinking about how many things I know so well that they're inbedded in my mind. His experience just shows that just because one learns something, doesn't mean they're going to remember it all the time. None of his teammates could figure it out either. Not until the end at least. It's funny how pressure blocks peoples' ability to rationally think sometimes. I think that's what happens to someone who is labeled a "bad test taker." I bet because they're a "bad test taker" the label puts added pressure on them and makes their mind go blank. These are just random thoughts...onto the real journaling...

I liked today's class. Sitting and listening to the history of education, or the history of anything for that matter, is always interesting to me. I guess I just like to hear about things that are foreign to me, and in history there are always new facts. How the lesson was taught today though seems like what I thought Freire was talking about when he described "banking education." I thought banking education was lecturing and telling students new information. After hearing Leila's story in class though, I think I need to redefine banking education. Yes, the history of education was lectured to us. Our minds were filled with dates and names for periods of time during the evolution of education, but as we learned it I was instantly able to apply it and understand. I was able to take what I know about education and the reform eras and put them together. Although the class wasn't taught today in a creative, "non-industrial" way, I can see how Dr. VEW didn't act like the teacher's Freire rants about. Instead she walked into the class assuming we know something, and from what we already knew she would expand our knowledge.

I'm also glad that we got to talk about the philosophy of our university's education department. I really do believe that it's pur job as future educators to make teaching more meaningful. Although it might not be possible to make every child want to learn, I know that I will try so hard to get them to want to. Already, from observation, I can see how teaching and learning are primarily relational. Often before a lesson, Ms. H shares her experiences with the class and then asks them to share their's if they wish. I think this helps the students develop respect for her as a teacher because she's showing she respects them as students. Just as she assigns them books to read, they bring her their favorite books to read. She honestly reads every one of the books too, and then discusses what she thought about the book with the student. From watching Ms. H, I see she's the kind of teacher I want to be like. During every class I make mental notes of how she interacts and deals with social conflict in the classroom. I'm still timid. I feel awkward telling kids to do their work if they're not participating. But I am learning, and am getting more comfortable with the kids. I know I haven't lost my status as "outsider" yet, but hopefully that stigma goes away soon. I don't know the students all that well yet, but being there three days a week instead of two gives me an advantage. I watch them attentively and I can honestly say that I see potential in all of them. Some are slower than others when it comes to understanding, and those are the ones Ms. H will have me work with in smaller groups. I see myself as a help in the classroom, and I really hope I can show these kids the potential they have to be high achievers. I hope that my love for learning is contageous and that I can bring creativity to the classroom.
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Based upon the tapestry of the liberally educated teacher, I have no doubt in my mind that I belong here. Although I don't agree with what is said 100% of the time, I understand the points that Dewey, Friere, and Dr. VEW are trying to get across. I may seem like I'm just disagreeing to be different at times, but I think it's important to question and requestion and have doubt in people's theories because that is the way to be a critical thinker. I'm not going to sit and regurgitate everything people want to hear. I guess I really am a problem-poser, but I didn't realize it until now. Education really is a process, a difficult, confusing, and tiring one.

Actually Teaching...

2006-01-23T11:09:00.000-08:00

Today, because the junior high does block scheduling, I observed a different class. Ms. H told me that I will be seeing this class more than the other so the child that will be assigned to me to profile will be from the class I observed today. The class I saw today was more quiet than the first. They're definitely not as wild and inappropriate. Ms. H pointed out that the class is less diverse too; she's told me how I'll soon notice how similar a lot of the kids are in the class. They took a spelling test, but I missed the second half of her lesson because I went out in the hall with Frank, a boy from the class, to test him one-on-one. She asked me to work alone with him because he's a slower writer and he gets stuck on words while the rest of the class goes on, and then everyone gets frustrated because the teacher has to catch him up. It was great! I read the words to him, defined them, and we worked at his pace. She says he normally gets Cs and Ds on spelling tests, but he got a B+ this time. If he did this everytime, worked at his own speed, he would probably do well on every spelling test. It's not that he's unintelligent, he just works at a different pace. I like how Ms. H uses her resources to accomodate the kids who she thinks need extra help. When I become a teacher, I will always make myself available for after school help because it's not always possible to focus on one child when you have a class of 30 to teach. Helping Frank today made me feel good, for the first time in observation I actually feel like I'm a teacher and that I can help.

One more thing that I thought was pretty cool today was when I heard a girl mention the coaches program to Ms. H. I wanted to do it, I went to the informational meeting, but the times just don't fit into my schedule due to my other classes. The one girl really wanted to be in it, but Ms. H told her that there isn't anyone to assign her to. Ms. H said only five people have signed up to be coaches. That means only ten kids can get extra help. It's horrible that here is this girl, wanting to get extra help, but there isn't anyone available for her. DR. VEW- Is there a special arrangement we can work out where I go over there and tutor, but at another time because 9ish and 10ish aren't doable. Neither is 2:00 on most days of the week.

Kristin

Getting Cozy and Cuddley with Racism

2006-01-22T17:27:00.000-08:00

It's been a good weekend, I did the oh-so-exciting Nieto readings (I'm sure they'll get better once I get past the explanation part--at least I hope). Something did catch my interest though in the introduction: "the discomfort of many white teachers in talking about racism." I think that I'm very different from many "typical white people" in this aspect. While my highschool wasn't made up of a very diverse population, I always had a very diverse group of close friends. In fact, only one of my close friends was 100% white. At the beginning of each of the friendships, I always felt alittle awkward when it came time to go to their houses and meet families. After awhile though I came to understand why my Filipino friends couldn't sleepover at my house and why my "chicano" friend always had a huge family party to go to. When I arrived at college I was shocked that the only girl on my floor who wasn't 100% white is 1/2 black and acts "white," according to the common sterotypes. I think my friends here are shocked by my lack of "political correctness" at times. When they hear me jokingly tell my friends that the reason they got a bad grade on a paper is "because [they're] not white," they look shocked. People are so worried about being PC and not offending other races. This renders them sheltered from a unique cultural perspective. It's sad that people "fear" other races. It's said that by 2007 "minorties" will outnumber "whites." With an increasingly diversified nation, the classroom will follow suit. The socioeconomics of America will no longer be enough to virtually segregate children. I know when I teach my class will be very diverse, and I think the comfort I feel in discussing race issues will only help me.

Boy Trouble

2006-01-20T12:02:00.000-08:00

Today was my second day of observing Ms. H's class and it went fairly well, but it didn't start out that way. I arrive normally when the seventh graders are eating lunch and then I just go sit in Ms H's room until lunch is over. Today the class room was locked though and I was forced to stand out in the halls waiting for Ms. H to unlock the door and let me in. While I was waiting in the hall way though a group of boys, some in my class and some not, came up to me and were like "So and So thinks you are so hot." Then they proceded to find the boy and bring him to me so they could tease him with me there. I didn't know how to react. Another teacher who was in the hall saw this, but he didn't say anything either. I just said nothing because I didn't want to give them a reaction and then I ignored them by talking to a 7th grade girl who's in my class. Dr. VEW warned us about this, but I guess I didn't take it seriously. I make sure that I don't wear anything provocative when I'm in the classroom, but I guess that's just how hormonal, young boys are. I didn't hear anymore of it at the end of class at least--thank god. That would have been so embarassing if Ms. H saw.

To begin class Ms. H puts four sentences with mistakes in them on the overhead and then calls up kids to correct the mistakes. One boy, Joe, I can tell is insanely intelligent and very interested in Geography. Ms. H tells me he has either and A or a B in all his classes, and that he always does all of his homework. However, when Ms. H asks Joe to participate and write on the overhead, he tells her no. He tries to hand off the correcting job to someone else. He even says he'll just take an "F" for his participation grade. He is persuaded though when Ms. H threatens a detention if he doesn't do it. I wondered to myself: why wouldn't he want to participate. From what I'm reading in School Girls, there seems to be quite a bit of evidence that boys tend to control the classroom, volunteering too much sometimes. I know that Joe, unlike a lot of the kids, actually writes the sentences on he paper and corrects them before they do it as a class. I also saw his paper and saw that he had the right answers. Still, he consistently gives Ms. H a hard time when she asks him questions. I'm no sociologist, but from what I see, Joe does it for attention and he wants to look like a tough guy. After writing the sentence corrections, which he only half did, Ms. H tells him that he forgot two words in the rearrangement and everyone in the class laughs. Joe responded with a cold "Shut up. It's not like I care anyway" to another boy, Tyler. Joe is so smart, but it seems like he's dumbing himself down in front of the other kids to "be cool." While I haven't been assigned to a student to profile yet, I kind of hope that it's a boy because I would really like to figure out if other boys display this same behavior.

These Class Discussions are Frustrating...

2006-01-19T09:37:00.000-08:00

Today in class we discussed Paulo Friere's "Pedagogy of the Oppressed." This was our second class discussion in a "big circle" and I'm not sure if I like how these discussions are being operated. It seems as though the same eight people, I know I'm one of them, talk while everyone else listens. It also seems as though what we say gets flipped around and becomes what we don't mean, which leads to students attacking others' opinions. I don't think people understand that there really isn't a proven right/wrong way to educate. Friere didn't back up what he was saying with case studies and, surveys, or other forms of evidence. He was merely speculating. When we discuss in class on this incredibly subjective topic, I feel that we try to much to objectify it. Friere's book is all opinion. He assumes that memory banking harms all students. I agree with what someone said today: we all learn best in different ways. Friere ignores that. Just like Friere, we have our own opinions. We share them in the discussion and people pose counterpoints. However, I feel like we never get anywhere in class because the group is so large. I think it would benefit us all to split into smaller groups. I've noticed that many people in the class don't speak up. I would like to hear their opinions rather than the same ones over and over. Smaller groups would give a chance for everyone to put in their two cents. Hearing everyones' opinions would only serve to benefit. The more perspectives that are thrown out- the better. These articles are very confusing at times and we all interpret them in different ways. I know that I have a different opinion from DR. VEW and many of my fellow students on many of these scholars' ideas. It's all because as I read, I interpret what's said in a different way. Next class I will propose smaller groups, I hope DR. VEW is open to the suggestion.

Kristin

A Good Day for Observation

2006-01-18T11:32:00.000-08:00

Today was my first day of observation at the junior high and I cannot wait to go back. The walk was quite the arduous trek, but it was worth the pain I suffered. When I first entered the school I'm sure I looked like a lost puppy. A lady from the front desk was very helpful though; she showed me where to sign in and which direction I should go. To get to the classroom I had to walk past the bustling lunch room. I expected everyone to stare at how awkward I was, but none of the seventh graders noticed I was there. They were too busy screaming and running around. It was chaos, I don't remember being like that in junior high, but I'm sure I was. The school is very clean and open (when students aren't shoving their way through the halls to get to class). I noticed that their lockers are enormous- I could have it in one!! We didn't have such luxuries at my junior high. I also noticed all the art work on the walls. Every where I turned my head I saw brightly colored construction paper. Yes, teachers still display student art work proudly and loudly as if it's the Mona Lisa. One group of art work I noticed was quite strange. Every picture was of a demon or ghost visiting someone in their sleep. I have no idea what kind of project it could be for, but some of the demons looked very scary.

The class I will be observing for the rest of the year is a fairly large and suprisingly diverse class. The teacher told me that I will be observing her "worst" class. By "worst" she means more rambunctious and out of control than the others. I saw the craziness she was talking about. When the kids walked in the room they were shouting and still hyper from lunch. However, I was very impressed by how Ms. H (the teacher) settled everybody down. She has good control over the class and I can tell that the kids respect her, at least to her face. I say "at least to her face" because she told me that lots of theft goes on in this class. She was angry at the beginning of class because all of her overhead markers had be stolen. The incident made me remember how fascinated we all used to be with overhead markers and how fun we thought it was to write with them. Kids used to steal them when I was in 7th grade too. One girl, Katie, raised her hand as Ms. H was telling the kids that whoever stole them needs to give them back, but she never got called on. Ms. H told me after class that Katie is the most brilliant person in the class and such a sweet girl, I think that's why she inferred that Katie wasn't raising her hand to confess. Instead, she thinks it's another girl in the class. The girl she thinks it is is very quiet and was one of the few who didn't show a real interest in me as "the new kid in the class." Today I got a really good feel for the type of students they are. I'm picking up names quickly, and I'm learning just how deceptive kids can be. The maturity level is so different, and I didn't realize how much I changed between junior high and highschool. Kids in this class have to be told to get out their homework five times and Ms. H has to repeat the same questions over and over. It must be so stressful. Still, just from today I know I want to be a teacher more than ever. I never want to leave the education system, I know I belong here. Til Friday...

Kristin

Reflections on our 1st Class Discussion and Some Interesting Readings...

2006-01-17T17:00:00.000-08:00

So today in class we had our first group discussion on John Dewey's My Pedagogic Creed. Since we have a pretty big class not many people got a chance to talk, and if people did talk I don't think they talked as much as they wanted to. Since Dewey's ideas are from the reform era, I have a difficult time seeing some of their relevance today. It seemed like everyone in the class though agreed with him 100%, which is very frustrating to me. I don't mind having a different opinion from everyone else, but it's hard to sit through a class discussion where everyone's views are or seem different from mine. I just finished reading Paulo Freire's "Pedagogy of the Oppressed" and while I feel that his points are relevant and supported, he presents them in ridiculous ways. This chapter basically is a redundant piece of what I'm sure is a redundant book in which he criticizes teachers that narrate and use "educational banking." I agree with Freire, teachers shouldn't just attempt to fill students' heads with knowledge. Education is reciprocal; students learn from teachers and vice versa. However, he gets a little extreme when he claims that teachers who "teach" memorization are oppressors and necrophilous people (essentially killing education). I think every student at one point in their lives has relied on raw memorization. Who calls that oppression though? I'm sure the discussion on Freire in class will be most enjoyable, I tell more in my next post.

For now I wanted to really focus on the letter. It's by a child who was part of a family that was starving and suffering during the Great Depresson, but the family is still regarded as middle class because of a european piano and her fathers' neckties. It's interesting how simple possessions inscrible status upon the possessors. Just because the dad wore ties, nobody would suspect the children of theft even if they were guilty. Instead, the poor kids were always to blame because they were beleived to have behavioral problems. I think the same thing goes on today. I assume that anyone I see who drives a Lexus or BMW is loaded, but maybe they put all their money into their car and live in a shanty house. In highschool, the kids with money would only be asked to leave if caught drunk at a school dance. The kids with less financial backing it seems didn't get off so easy. One time, they even called the cops. I think it's wrong to expect things out of people based on where they are financially. However, I wonder if this trend will ever change?

Kristin

Kristin on "Dewey on Education"

2006-01-15T10:08:00.000-08:00

I just finished the weekend reading assignment, My Pedagogic Creed by John Dewey, and I am not sure how I feel about what he has to say. While I am aware that Dewey is considered one of the greatest educational reformers of all time, the date of this essay is 1959, and I'm not sure how relevant these ideas are today. Dewey reasons that because "school is primarily a social institution," education is "a social process" (Dewey 22). He lists for six pages what he believes schools are and what education should be. Underlying all of this is his belief that schools should take the form of a community. Current educational institutions, he believes, focus too much on "the school as a place where certain information is to be given, where certain lessons are to be learned, or where certain habits are to be formed" (23). He also sees problems with the school curriculums. He believes that "we violate the child's nature and render difficult the best ethical results, by introducing the child too abruptly to a number of special studies, of reading, writing, geography, etc., out of relation to this social life" (25). What would a curriculum based upon the element of socialization look like? It would probably consist of gym class and music (two classes that involve a lot of activity and teamwork) and group projects (emphasizing cooperation and again, teamwork). In my middle school we would often break into groups to have discussions over the reading material, and we loved it. However, we loved it because we never really talked about the book. Instead it turned into gossip time. Too much emphasis on social aspects I don't think is productive in an environment established for learning. One can learn just as much in a group as they potentially can by listening to a teacher lecture. If there is one thing I know, it's that children learn in many different ways. True, some learn best socializing in a group, but what about the kids that are put into a group who are shy. They tend to hold back, listening to others, not contributing their own ideas. Some learn best through visuals, like videos, others learn best by just listening, such as lecturing. I learn best by another visual, not pictures, but words: reading. Due to the fact that everyone learns differently, the way schools are operated now is probably best. Teaching concentrated subjects such as reading, spelling, and math to kids at an early age will reap them benefits for the future. Dewey says it's best to educate for the present, but honestly education has always been about the future. We educate children because it's easier to mold minds at a young age, and with the knowledge they gain from school, we hope they'll become productive adults. I like what J.D. says, it sounds really nice, but it's not realistic. I wonder though, is there a real answer to make education perfect?

How Would My Life be Different if I were a Boy...

2006-01-13T15:50:00.000-08:00

I just finished reading the introduction to School Girls and in it Peggy Orenstein writes about one teacher's experiment which is entitled the "gender journey." At the beginning of class each year, this teacher asks the middle schoolers to rewind and imagine all the way back to the time of their birth. At the time of their birth though something changes, and they become a member of the opposite sex. Then they must fast forward their lives, as a member of the opposite sex, to where they are now. Then the teacher asks asks each member of the class to make a list of how their life is as a 6th grade member of the opposite sex. After the lists are done each child shares one quality they imagine themselves possessing as a member of their new sex. While reading this, I imagined what my own list might say and what it means.

My List-
1. I would probably be more athletic
2. I would probably have many girlfriends rather than one serious boyfriend
3. I think I would be a business major
4. I might attend a large University, probably U of I
5. I wouldn't be so spend thrifty
6. I would work at a higher paying job
7. I could have been "more popular" and outgoing growing up instead of a pushover

I'm sure I could think of more, but I'm just going to stop it there. According to Orenstein's findings, women are more likely to feel limited by their gender in what they say, do, and the choices they make. I can agree with this, mostly for my younger years. Now I don't feel limited, I'm doing exactly what I want. Yes, my life would be different if I were a guy. I wouldn't obsess over my body and being "fat." I would probably feel more comfortable in large groups. I don't think I have an inferiority complex though. Over the years I have become increasingly more confident and sure of myself, academically. I always expect failure though, because I'm a perfectionist. However, in the end, deep down, I know I'm going to do ok. I looking forward to reading more in this book. I'm sure I will learn many new things about myself and my fellow girl friends.

Kristin

Middle School: The Awkward Years

2006-01-12T14:33:00.000-08:00

Today in class we reviewed the syllubus and wrote down what we would like to read for our literature circles. I really hope I get to read School Girls because I know I will be able to relate to almost everything in the book. Being able to relate would improve my understanding and teaching of the content more so than if I were to read the book about being a Mexican-American student, for example. School Girls I think would teach me how to help girls deal with the confidence issues they face. I'm positive that during my observation I will encounter girls who are dealing with the same struggles that I dealt with in middle school. It's a tough age and I remember kids were so cruel at times. Between popularity fiascos, body issues, and a new developed interest in boys middle schoolers still have to manage being students, athletes, and being members of whatever clubs they might belong to. When I look back on my junior high years I am more than glad that they're over. I hated them so much because I didn't have friends I could trust and I was afraid to stand up for myself because I wanted everyone to like me. I know when I walk into that classroom Wednesday morning I'm going to be able to tell right away who the "pretty girls" as well as which girls just don't seem to fit in. Although I am aware of the fact that I can't be their friends, I hope I can be a mentor and set a positive example for how people ought to be treated. If I see a girl or boy who gets picked on, I'm going to try my best to talk to them because I know that the single fact that I'm a college student and paying attention to a middle schooler would be enough to make them feel valued. I wish someone had done that for me when I was in middle school. It is such a tough group of years, but I'm pumped to start working with them.

Kristin

Why I Want to be a Teacher...

2006-01-11T16:47:00.000-08:00

When I was growing up I never really had any direction in my life. I would want to be a vet one day and a movie star the next. It wasn't until my sophomore year English 2H class that I realized I wanted to be a high school English teacher, but I haven't had a doubt in my mind since. In school I'm more of a foreign language-history-English person as opposed to a Math-Science person. This has always been the case and will probably never change. When I began taking Ms. Zajac's honors English class though I was just average, and never considered myself to ever be on top in anything I tried. After our first paper was graded and handed back she gave us an opportunity that a teacher had never given to me before: she let us revise our papers. I met with her to talk about my revisions, which was scary because I had never asked a teacher for extra help before. She went over everything with me. She explained literary devices, helped me structure my arguments, and taught me how to effectively use quotes for support. She never made me feel stupid in her presence. She was always open to help me and I believe she honestly cared about how well I did in her class. From her I have learned alomost everything I know about English. Junior and Senior year I was always at the top of the class and I received many praises from teachers on my improved writing style. Ms. Zajac truly inspired me and showed me what a teacher should be. I learned from her and respected her and I am forever indebted to her. She is what I want to be. I want to be a tough teacher, but I want students to learn something from me. I know I would always make myself available for extra help because I think time and patience are two of the most important things teachers can offer to students. I hope I can inspire one day. I was editor of my Highschool newspaper and from that I learned a great deal about teaching people to write the way I want, effective editing, and being a leader who helps her team develop. Still, friends from highschool send their papers to me to edit because they know I will over my best criticisms and teach them to correct repetetive mistakes they make so they can write better next time. Helping people in a subject that I love is my dream job. Even though I'm sure I won't make nearly enough money, I don't care because I know teaching will make me so happy.

Kristin

Reflections on the First Day of Class

2006-01-11T15:26:00.000-08:00

Now that the first day of class is over, I can say that I'm looking forward to what Ed. Studies and Dr. VEW have in store for me this semester. I expect this class to make me want to become a highschool English even more than I already do. However, after looking at the 22 page long syllubus I think this class is going to involve a lot more work than I expected it to. I'm excited for the literature circles. I hope I'm in the group that read the book about teaching African American sudents. I'm also excited for the portfolio because I haven't had a chance so far in college to do projects that require a lot of creativity. I love when I get to be creative. I am nervous about the profile letter though. Getting to know a child on a one-on-one basis and then writing a letter to the parents telling what I think they should do to help the child meet their goals sounds like it could potentially be a touchy subject. As for classmates, I don't really know too many people yet but I'm sure I'll get along and be civil with everyone. Dr. VEW is very outgoing and I think she will keep the 75 minute class as interesting as it can possibly be. I think that if she's ever in a bad mood though, and not bubbly, the class could be very boring. I'm anxious to start observing Ms. H's class. I contacted her today and she emailed me back already. She seems friendly. I'll start observing right after orientation she said. I am definitely not looking forward to the walk to get to teh middle school though.

Kristin